Life in 3D

Christmas pics

2009-01-06T18:37:00.006-06:00

Finally uploading pics and vids from Christmas. Pics from top to bottom: my brother Kelvin and his son, almost-one-year-old Nathan; extended family singing the "Hallelujah" Chorus - Bruce's mom is the very short women and my mom is looking over her shoulder; Emily and "Bella" Nave - they're second cousins, once removed (generations are very screwy in my family!); my dad and Nathan; silly Christmas hats on Bruce's mom, Emily, and my mom. The antlers light up!

For those who don't know, a tradition on my dad's side of the family is to sing the "Hallelujah" Chorus in 4-part harmony whenever we get together at Christmas time. It's a very musical family, though none of us is a professional. To all my orchestra colleagues - please be kind!

Emily turns 5!

2008-12-09T20:14:00.006-06:00

We had a fun gymnastics b-day party for Emily at a nearby YMCA last Sunday. Six of her friends (4 boys, 2 girls - quite typical of her social tendencies!) and one or both of their parents joined us. They had an hour of tumbling led by Y staff, then an hour for cake and presents. It was by all accounts a resounding success. Not sure what the kids liked better, the tumbling activities or just running around playing with all the balloons! Anyway, here are some pics. (Oh, the one at the top is from celebrating at school.)

Halloween pics

2008-11-04T18:51:00.004-06:00

Finally got a few Halloween pics to share. Yes, Emily was Periwinkle from Blue's Clues again this year. Interestingly, when we first asked her what she wanted to be, she said Periwinkle. I wasn't thrilled with the idea and encouraged her to think of something new. She said she wanted to be an animal so I pulled some options from Ebay for her to look at and she chose a mouse costume. The costume didn't arrive in time, however, so we had to run out Wed night to find another costume before H-ween festivities at her school. We went to a big costume warehouse where we got last year's costume. After looking through all the costumes, she found the Periwinkle costume and said that's what she wanted. It was only $2 on clearance so I couldn't argue with her! (And no, she wouldn't have fit into last year's costume.)

Emily and Barack Obama

2008-11-04T11:02:00.003-06:00

A few weeks ago, Emily's school held a mock presidential election. I'm not sure what kind of info E's class got on the two major candidates, or if the teacher just held up their pics and asked, "Who would you vote for?" Emily voted for Obama. Don't know if she has absorbed some of Bruce's and my political conversations or what prompted her in that direction.

Had a funny and sweet follow-up to that last night and today. Last night I had the radio on while E was taking her bath. In the "top-of-the-hour" headlines, the anchor noted the passing of Obama's grandmother. E heard Obama's name and said, "Why are they talking about Barack Obama?" I said that his g-mother died. E said, "Oh, we need to pray for her." I said we don't pray for dead people, and she said, "No, I mean his mommy." I said, "Well, his mommy is dead, too. As a matter of fact, his mommy, daddy, g-mother and g-father are all dead. So he's very sad." E then said, "We need to pray that God will bring them back to life again." It's good to know she's remembering the Bible stories we read to her, but now we're getting into deep theological water! I said, "Well, you're right that God can do that, but usually he doesn't. He did it just a few special times." After thinking a moment, E said in a sad voice, "Oh. We need to pray for him." And she remembered at bedtime to pray for him. - Very sweet.

The funny part came later in the conversation when E said that she liked Obama. I asked her why. She said, "Because he's so snuggly!" I laughed SO hard! I said, "How do you know he's snuggly?" She then launched into a long made-up story about him being ticklish and that he came to her school when she was 14 years old. Whenever she makes up things, she always says that it happened when she was 14 or 15 years old. Don't know what that means, but it's a helpful landmark to know when she's making stuff up!

This morning as I was driving her to school, we passed a polling place where the line was out the door. I pointed it out to her, saying that today was the day that grown-ups vote for president. She said, "I chose Barack Obama, so you need to choose Barack Obama." Yes, ma'am, right away, ma'am! I asked her again why she liked Obama. This time she said, "Because he's smiley." I liked that answer and I think it's indicative of a number of things, which I won't go into because most of my readers are Republican.

In all honesty, for Emily I think it boils down to Obama being a nice-looking guy, and I can't fault her for that. It's why I voted for Jimmy Carter in my elementary school's prez election in 1976!

The Hairband

2008-10-15T16:19:00.003-05:00

Here's a picture of Emily with her new hairband. Unfortunately her teacher had to confiscate it yesterday because she kept taking it off and flicking it around - argh.

life in the fast lane

2008-10-08T10:09:00.002-05:00

I again have to apologize for now blogging regularly. To be perfectly honest, most of the stuff going on in my life is not "blog-able" for one reason or another. Suffice it to say, it's overall a tough time in the 3D household.

A bright spot: Last night Emily and I went shopping for new shoes and other essentials for her ever-growing body. We passed by a stand that held headbands. Now keep in mind, Emily has never been a "girly-girl" - we can't get her to wear a dress or skirt, though in the last 6 months she has begun enjoying wearing "skorts." When she was younger, if we could get the dress or skirt on her, at least it would stay on since she didn't know how to undress herself. Obviously that's no longer the case! She also won't let me put barrettes in her hair, and she doesn't like to have her hair cut. Bad combo. Anyway, Emily saw the headbands and remarked that they were pretty. I then put one in her hair, while not expecting her to let me or expecting her to whip it off as soon as I let go. Instead she smiled and laughed, and she looked absolutely DARLING! So I bought it for her in an effort to encourage her femininity! She wanted to wear it to school this morning. I put it on her and then she ran into the bathroom to see what she looked like. She gasped and yelled, "I look so pretty!" Hopefully she'll come home with it so I can get a picture of her.

And now for some cynicism (you didn't think I could get through a whole post without it, did you??): In my list of favorite websites here on the blog is Despair.com. Despair.com is for anyone who feels an urge to retch whenever they see a poster from the Successories store. I'm on their weekly email list, which promotes various sales and new products, and today's was a classic. Here's their newest "Demotivator":
Corruption - I want either less corruption or more opportunity to participate in it.

Some gems from the email in promoting the product:

How did the nation that once repudiated aristocracy and celebrated meritocracy become a place where financial gains were privatized while financial losses were socialized? ... [emphasis mine]

But here we are. In a capitalism married to socialism while flirting with plutocracy and considering an affair with kleptocracy. And no, I'm not a Marxist. I just want a system that's fair.

That's all for now.

Economic musings

2008-09-25T09:42:00.004-05:00

Those with economic training, please be kind, but here are some random thoughts re. the current economic crisis:

The idea that my tax dollars would be used to "bail out" Wall St firms who just a couple of years ago were disbursing up to 9-figure bonuses makes me want to vomit.
Funny, our education and healthcare systems have been just about as broken as the current economy, and you don't see the president or Congress bailing those out.
The idea of a bail-out of the industry that posits itself as the paragon of capitalism seems very anti-capitalist. At best, capitalism is like economic Darwinism - survival of the fittest. Make a bad choice, pay the consequences. Hmmm, that's what we try to teach Emily every day.
A free "bail-out" (i.e., one that doesn't have to be paid back) is another example of "trickle-down" economics which does little to nothing to give relief to those whose homes are in foreclosure or now can't secure a loan for their small business or child's college education. Yes, I'm well aware that part of the crisis is due to some everyday people making poor choices about how much debt they could handle. I also know from various news reports (also here and here) that mortgage brokers were given big incentives to lend as much money as possible, not to mention the flat-out predatory lending that exploited first-time home buyers.
Pres. Bush wants no oversight of the Treasury Secretary as he works to fix an economy that imploded due to ... no oversight. Does he really think we're that stupid???
I missed Pres. Bush's speech Wed. night due to a work event. I caught a little analysis afterward on the radio as I was driving home. Sen. Bob Bennett (R-Utah) said, "If we take the time to do this right, we want to put this provision in and that provision in, and debate it for another week, and thus declare that we're not serious, the markets will fall off the cliff." Listen here. The above comment is around the 27:10 mark.
Ultimately, this crisis was born out of unrestrained greed. No amount of legislation or regulation can touch that issue of the heart.

Our church in the NY Times

2008-09-04T09:47:00.002-05:00

I just learned today that our church was profiled in June in the end-all-be-all of newspapers, the NY Times. I think the article is quite fair and accurate, to the extent of my knowledge. It definitely shows why we love this church - placing Jesus above politics. And if our critics would actually listen to the sermons that are available on the website, they would know that the church does anything BUT "undermine or take away from the seriousness of sin".

Back to school

2008-08-26T17:45:00.000-05:00

Emily is in her 2nd week of school and is currently less than thrilled about it. She was initially excited to go back, but by Friday of last week she was a sobbing mess when I tried to leave her at school. I should have known better than to accompany her to her classroom, but since the previous days had been fine and I hadn't yet seen her classroom, I went. It then took 3 tries for me to get out of the building. Twice, after I'd physically detached her from my body and walked out of the classroom, she ran after me sobbing, "MOMMY!!!!" The third time the asst teacher came out of the classroom and asked Emily to come with her to help her find something. I carried Emily to the final separation point and then the teacher took her hand and Emily acquiesced.

Today the rebellion started at home, with Emily saying she didn't want to go to school, didn't want to see her friends, etc. She cried most of the way to school, but God very kindly allowed us to arrive at exactly the same time as her closest school friend (who unfortunately is in a different class) and we all walked onto the playground together. (They line up in their individual classes outside when the weather is nice.) Emily still insisted on me accompanying her into her classroom, clinging to my hand with her clincher grip and starting to cry, but fortunately I was able to leave her in the classroom without tears (that I heard, at least).

I'm guessing that at first she was excited about going back to school because she thought it would be all the same kids. Now that some of her friends have moved into other classes (her classroom is P3, P4 and kindergarten so last year's kindergartners have moved into 1st grade), including a few of those who were the sweetest to her, she's having to adjust to the change. Neither of her parents likes change, either, so she comes by it naturally. The school atmosphere is also rougher than how we or our friends conduct our households, and we've tried to keep close tabs on her reactions to that, i.e. is she consistently saying that the kids or teachers are mean, etc. To date that hasn't been a problem so far as we can see, which is why we're thinking/hoping that this reluctance to go to school is just the adjustment to the new routine. It's no fun for Mommy, though! Daddy gets the happier job of pick-up - hardly fair!

To end this on a happier note, I'll include a couple of pics from some summertime activities. One is from July 4 festivities downtown St. Louis - that's the one where she's falling down the inflatable slide. Everyone watching gasped loudly as she proceeded to fall on her face and roll to the bottom. Emily, however, wasn't phased in the least and wanted to go again! That's our thrill-seeking girl! The other, where it looks like she's looking out of a cage, is from a day we spent at the City Museum. Definitely one of the most fun places in St. Louis for kids of all ages, and it's a FULL aerobic work-out!

Change

2008-08-19T13:29:00.003-05:00

Don't have time to write a lot right now. Emily went back to school so we're dealing with the usual St. Louis Public Schools disorganization, more people are resigning at work, creating more work for the rest of us, and I'm doing a lot of self-examination. I read recently, "Change is part of living a real life." So many times I want to cling to the past and believe that the future is a fearful place, rather than trusting that God has "plans to prosper [me] and not to harm [me], plans to give [me] a hope and a future" (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV). Without change we don't grow - physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually. But change is also inherently uncomfortable, at least to some degree. (Moving to a larger house, for us, would be a welcome change, but the process of moving is a pain.) If I try to hide from change, I become disconnected from God because I'm not trusting in His goodness, and I disconnect from those around me because I'm afraid of the pain I'd experience if/when they depart from my life.

For the females reading this, I remind myself too often of Marilla Cuthbert in the "Anne of Green Gables" books/movies. It's been a long time since I read the books so I don't remember if the following quote is authentic or created for the film "Anne of Avonlea," but it sums up what my emotional philosophy has been most of my life:

Marilla Cuthbert: You set your heart too much on frivolous things and then crash down into despair when you don't get them.
Anne Shirley: I know. I can't help flying up on the wings of anticipation. It's as glorious as soaring through a sunset... almost pays for the thud.
Marilla Cuthbert: Well, maybe it does. But I'd rather walk calmly along and do without flying AND thud.

I used to believe that too, Marilla. Now I'm not so sure.

Future wine critic?

2008-08-15T09:46:00.002-05:00

This doesn't make a whole lot of sense in light of Monday's post, but Emily may have a future as a wine critic. Last night she was sneezing a LOT, had a drippy nose and was overall very whiny. We thought she may have been coming down with a cold so Bruce wanted to give her some medicine. As you might imagine, getting her to take medicine has always been a challenge. The last time she was sick, Bruce found he was able to sneak the medicine into her by mixing it into strawberry yogurt (one of her favorite foods) and sometimes in apple juice. Last night he first tried juice. She took a few sips, then wailed that she wanted juice "without anything in it." Ratio: 6 oz juice - 2 tbsp medicine. So he tried yogurt. When he brought it to her, the first thing she noticed was that the color was paler. (The medicine is clear so it dilutes the bright pink of the yogurt.) Bruce convinced her that it was still strawberry yogurt and got her to take a bite. Evidently the medicine has an aftertaste because she had a delayed reaction. When it first hit her tongue, it was fine, but after a second or two she started wailing. Ratio: 6-7 oz strawberry yogurt - 2 tbsp med. At that point, Bruce said, "OK, now we have to go the violent route," and proceeded to force straight medicine into her mouth.

Afterward I joked with Bruce that maybe one day she'll be a great wine critic. I can hear her now: "Deep golden yellow with orange, green and red reflections, full-bodied, with intense sweetness set off beautifully by natural balancing acidity. On the nose and palate a remarkably complex array of aromas and flavors, those including ripe yellow peaches, apricots, eucalyptus honey and sugar-glazed pineapple. As the wine develops look for spices that will rise as well as a gentle hint of caramel that will start to tip-toe in in another decade" (lifted from here).

If this won't make you an insecure perfectionist, I don't know what will

2008-08-13T10:13:00.004-05:00

A New York Times article today reports that the Chinese government pulled a "Milli Vanilli" on the world during the opening ceremony of the Olympics last Friday. The child's voice heard singing the Chinese national anthem as the flag arrived in the stadium was not the voice of the child standing in the stadium, but was the voice of another child. The visible child was deemed the "cuter" of the two, but the other was the better singer. The worst part about it all was that neither child was told of the arrangement until afterward. According to the article, neither was upset, but I'd be interested to talk to both of them in 10 years and see what lasting impact it had.

The rhetoric by the Chinese government and the ceremony's producers justifying their actions really shocked me with its 1950's style Communist propaganda/brain-washing. I kept thinking, "Wow, people still think this way in the 21st century???" I know China still tightly controls media and education, but I thought they'd progressed more than this. Some examples:

“The reason was for the national interest,” explained Chen Qigang, general music designer of the opening ceremonies, who revealed the deception Sunday during a radio interview. “The child on camera should be flawless in image, internal feeling and expression.”...

“Everyone should understand this in this way,” Mr. Chen said. “This is in the national interest. It is the image of our national music, national culture, especially during the entrance of our national flag. This is an extremely important, extremely serious matter.”

If the Chinese government is like this with children singing a 5-minute song, imagine the pressure the Chinese Olympic athletes feel.

"It's just like chicken rice salad!"

2008-08-11T13:56:00.002-05:00

Getting Emily to try ANYTHING new in the clothes or food department is a struggle, and usually not a quiet one. I had grand plans of expanding her diet this summer so we'd have more options for packing her lunch in the new school year (which starts next week). No luck. Crying, wailing, even vomiting are her reactions to any new taste or texture. For example, the only flavor of yogurt or jelly she'll eat is strawberry. We tried again to get her to eat a fresh strawberry last week (or as fresh as you can get from the grocery store). She licked the inside of a halved strawberry and immediately starting crying and wailed, "It's YUCK!" (She doesn't say "yucky" for some reason.) The mind is a powerful thing.

Yesterday we went over to my friend Marsha's house to swim. Emily of course can't swim so is dependent on an adult or some flotation device to keep her head above water. Marsha said she had recently bought a swim vest that would fit Emily (she'd had another one, but it was too small). E proceeded to do the usual hysterical protest, but I forced the vest onto her, taking care not to break her arms as I forcibly folded them to put them through the armholes. Once E discovered that she could swim independently with the vest, she was so excited! The only problem is that when she gets excited, she chatters and laughs incessantly (or more incessantly than usual, if that's possible), which resulted in her swallowing several mouthfuls of chlorinated water!

What does this have to do with chicken rice salad? Well, it's a story my family has loved to tell on me ever since I first started bringing boyfriends home. I'm not sure how old I was, though I know I was much older than Emily - maybe 9 or 10. My mom had gone out of town for a few days - I think she went to visit her mother in Wisconsin when she (my grandmother) wasn't well. Like the always-prepared mother she is, she left lots of pre-made food for us that required little to no cooking on our part. One of those things was chicken rice salad. I don't remember if it was the first time this had shown up on the dinner table, though I think it was. Anyway, I loudly refused to try it, using the same tactics as my daughter now uses with me (a mother's revenge - what goes around...). I'm not sure what ultimatum was threatened, but I finally choked down a bite - and discovered I LOVED IT! I ended up eating a second helping. So whenever someone in my family doesn't want to try something - food, activity, whatever - everyone else says in unison, "It's just like chicken rice salad!"

Eating a little crow

2008-08-08T17:15:00.000-05:00

I have to confess that, over the years, I've been skeptical of the "science" of chiropractics. Too many of these people claim that they can essentially cure every ailment known to man by adjusting your back. While I believe that the human body is more complex than we understand and Western medicine is, overall, too specialized and needs to be more holistic in its approach, I don't buy the idea that chiropractics is a cure-all.

I have some scoliosis in my upper back and a nice big curve in my lower back (the last bit I didn't know prior to the x-rays my chiropractor took). The discs caught in between are starting to compress. As a result of all that (I think that's the right cause and effect), I have one hip higher than the other, which then makes one leg shorter than the other (something I've known since I was a teenager trying to get some pants altered). This can cause significant pain and stiffness if I'm on my feet for a length of time. Sometimes it's so aggravated that I can actually feel my body on a tilt, rising up on one leg and coming down lower on the other. I was also developing sciatica down my left side if I sit for long periods, and I have a sedentary job. The pain was starting to keep me up at night and I decided I finally needed to do something about it.

I must admit that after seeing a chiropractor rather intensively over the last month, my back is feeling LOADS better than it has in years. I went to New York on a business trip just a couple of weeks after I started going to the chiropractor, and after tromping around Manhattan for 24 hours, I didn't have the pain and stiffness I have had in past trips. The doctor has given me some stretching and strengthening exercises, which helps alleviate my skepticism. Maybe I can get to the point where I don't need to go to the chiropractor. My other problem with chiropractors is that it seems like a racket where they convince their patients that they have to keep coming back in order to feel well. I think some people's pains are psychosomatic - they don't think they're in pain until it occurs to them that they haven't been to the chiropractor in a while. Then all of a sudden they feel pain. The mind is a powerful thing.

A concern I do have is how this will play out as I get older. I was a bit shocked when I saw the curvature of my lower back. It's certainly not the worst the doctor had ever seen, but it was obvious. She didn't have to point it out to me. Rather, my reaction when she first hung up the x-ray was, "Whoa! That's not right!" The doctor isn't saying she can fix it, but rather can help get the muscles around it to function properly to "stabilize" it so it won't get worse. That's fine by me, as I have no desire to have back surgery. I'm just concerned about the effect of aging and the traditional female problem of osteoporosis. Well, I guess we'll cross that bridge when/if we come to it.

Depravity, with a dash of crazy

2008-08-07T13:09:00.003-05:00

You'd think by this time in my life I wouldn't be surprised by the insanity of human depravity, and yet yesterday I got a double dose and it left me speechless. While I can't go into details in this public forum, one story consisted of a group of people who decided to go around some rather important rules despite being encouraged otherwise, got caught, now face significant legal troubles, and now want the people who encouraged them to do it "the old-fashioned way" to take over the situation. Needless to say, the "old-fashioned" folks (who have been burned multiple times by the people in trouble) are laughing uproariously. When I heard the story, I laughed too, out of incredulity. Who in their right mind would expect someone to take back a situation they tried to help you avoid in the first place, now that the legal ramifications have, in fact, come to pass??? But that's the lunacy of depravity.

The other situation comprised an individual who may have literally mentally snapped. "Pat" (in Saturday Night Live style, I'll use an androgynous name to protect both me and the individual) is not all that mentally or emotionally stable to being with, bordering on clinically paranoid. Pat takes everything very personally and believes that most people are out to get him/her. For some reason, Pat has decided I'm not one of them so I've been a confidante/mentor of sorts, which has been a bit of a dicey situation for me. Circumstances with Pat have been building over the last several months and blew up Mon-Wed this week. Pat called me Wed. morning with a tale of woe which grew less plausible as it went on. I think Pat has believed various lies for so long that s/he actually thinks they're true. Unfortunately Pat's issues are creating problems for several people, with potential legal ramifications. Hopefully I won't get dragged into it. As I was talking to Bruce about Pat last night, he said, "Pat sounds like [Psycho Neighbor]!" I actually think Psycho is a little saner than Pat, which is not a compliment to Pat. Fortunately I have not been the object of Pat's wrath.

Tickle therapy

2008-08-05T12:49:00.004-05:00

"If you're feeling blue and you don't know what to do,
There is nothing like a tickle time to make you feel like new."
--Sandra Boynton, "Tickle Time" (the link is to a sound sample so have your speakers turned up)

Ok, yesterday really stank. One more development colleague of mine tendered her resignation and another told me of her intention to do so, making it 3 resignations in the last week just in our dept. It's a tough dept to be in right now. We've been without a permanent boss (VP for Development) since Oct. 1 of last year, and there's no end in sight. Since early April we've had a consultant filling in. We're also still "breaking in" a new executive director and new board chairman. We're all pretty tired. The scariest thing about these latest departures is that I don't know how we can fill them before we've hired a new VP. Who would take a job without knowing who their boss would be? To my knowledge, there's no one on the horizon for the VP job. So that means months of extra work for those of us who are left when we're already tired.

Last night I arrived home from work pretty depressed. Emily's favorite thing to do when I come home is to "hide" (she's really not hard to see, and even if you pretend not to see her, she'll start giggling to help you find her!) and then run away. This launched into a full-fledged "tickle time"! She has the greatest giggle, and loves to be tickled. My family will remember that I used to be so ticklish under my chin that they couldn't tie my coat hood (not good during a Michigan winter). Emily has inherited that trait, and when I tickle her there, she lets out full-belly laughs. We had a lot of fun and it was a wonderful stress reliever for me. Emily truly is our "Little Miss Sunshine."

Another classic St. Louis Public Schools moment

2008-08-04T09:50:00.003-05:00

Over the weekend we were pleasantly surprised to receive information through the mail about the start of the new school year. Advance info is not a strength of the St. Louis Public Schools, although I have noticed that the district as a whole is better at it than our particular school. Case in point: on Sunday we got a call from the mother of a school friend of Emily's. She (very wisely) had been perusing the SLPS website to see if there was any info there that had not been sent to us. She discovered that the "bell times" for our school have been moved an hour later. There was no indication of that in the packet we received on Sat. I'm actually glad about this - it will be much easier for us to get Emily to school by 9:10 rather than 8:10 am. But the fact that we haven't been officially notified by the school makes us incredulous. Some parents might not be as flexible in their work schedules as we are, and this could be a problem if they're not given enough advance warning. I'm sure that, like last year, the school's mentality is, "They'll find out when they register at the school the week of Aug. 11." (At least this year we received info about registering, unlike last year.) Could be a shock for those who don't get there until Friday the 15th. This is NOT how a district attracts middle-class families.

Friendly blogs

2008-08-01T10:56:00.002-05:00

Since restarting this blog, I sent an e-note out to friends and family letting them know I was back up and running. Two responded back that they have started their own blogs. I think it's a good example of the breadth of God's Kingdom. Brad Eades, Bruce's best friend from seminary, is irreverent, sarcastic, and sardonic, but also thoughtful and caring. Here's his blog: http://www.bradatude.blogspot.com/

Mary Bernard, on the other hand, couldn't be sweeter (although I will say, Mary, that you've gotten a little edgier as the years have gone by!). Mary is a former colleague of mine from Nashville Symphony days. Here's her link: http://www.writingmomof3.blogspot.com/

I'll put them both on my home page as well.

I thought Xers were the self-entitled whiners

2008-07-31T16:38:00.002-05:00

Found a provocative article on an arts blog today (imagine that - artists being provocative). According to a new social and demographics survey by the Pew Research Center, "Baby Boomers are the most pessimistic, disappointed, and self-entitled generation of the 20th century." Here's the Washington Post article about it, which is quite tongue in cheek while also giving some interesting food for thought.

The Flyover blog then extrapolates that to the arts world:

This attitude as applied to the arts: People should care about the arts, boomers say. They should give money to arts organizations. If they don’t, boomers say, then they’re stupid. If they don’t, then artists are victims.

Wow, is that ever true! I've run across this attitude among arts administrators, donors/patrons, artists, funding agencies and arts critics. It's a mindset that does a huge disservice to the arts, positing that the arts don't need to adapt and redefine themselves to contemporary society. I'm not talking about "dumbing down" the art, but arts organizations have to use our famed creativity to engage people in new ways and show our relevance. The "rub" lies in the fact that this may necessitate a complete overhaul of how the arts world is structured. (See 9/21/07 post)

Love this final thought from the Washington Post article:

"People born in times of cultural renewal tend to take an overt attitude of pessimism," [Neil] Howe says.

They see their pessimism as a tonic that will wake up the world, then they just end up drunk on disappointment.

P.S. No offense to my Boomer friends and family members reading this!

To flex or not to flex

2008-07-30T12:58:00.003-05:00

The arts world has been debating in the last several years about how to contend with the precipitous decline in subscription buyers. For many years, most arts orgs were moving in the direction of making subscriptions and ticket buying in general as flexible as possible. Orgs have also focused more resources on attracting single ticket buyers, which takes a lot more time and money than retaining subscribers.

A few major orchestras (Pittsburgh, St. Paul and maybe one other) have been experimenting in the last 4-5 years with a different system which focuses on increasing people's commitment. They look at a patron's financial involvement holistically, taking into account both ticket sales and donations, and ascribe benefits to those patrons based on that total amount. (I'm not sure if they take into account whether the patron is single or married.) Their goal is to increase dollars per household, with the idea that, regardless of whether those dollars are for tickets or donations, those dollars signify commitment to the organization and make the patron more likely to buy/give again - i.e. creating sustainable, low-cost revenue. This of course requires a restructuring of administration so that the traditionally "silo-ed" departments of marketing and developing work together seamlessly - something tantamount to a miracle in most arts orgs! These orchestras made a presentation at last year's League of American Orchestras conference and showed some encouraging results, though the effort hadn't been going on long enough at that point to be conclusive.

Interestingly, today's Philadelphia Inquirer has an article on a new "membership" program the Philly Orch is unveiling. Looks like they're continuing with the "traditional model," as the Pittsburgh/SPCO people would say. It's sort of a hybrid of subscription and single ticket buying - pay a monthly membership fee which entitles you to discounted tickets. The higher the monthly fee, the higher the discount. Sort of like a gym membership in a way. It'll be interesting to see how it goes. I'm skeptical. A person would have to buy a significant number of tickets each month to make back her money. And I think a target of 1,500 people signing up for this is overly optimistic. But I've never been accused of being an optimist!

Another choral recommendation

2008-07-30T12:38:00.003-05:00

When I traveled to Denver in June for the National Performing Arts Convention, I picked up a couple of new (to me) choral CDs (I know, I'm SO last century for buying CDs). Once again, the Dale Warland Singers produced a masterpiece: Lux Aurumque. The first track in particular, Gretchaninoff's "Of Thy Mystical Supper," is spectacular, an example of everything that's so wonderful about Russian choral music. Click here to listen to a sample. I've had it on repeat on my car's CD player off and on for weeks to the point where I've memorized the Russian!

It broke my heart when this group disbanded in 2004. They were, IMO, the finest mixed-voice a cappella choir in the US, if not the world. I expect this CD is the last to be produced by the group - it just came out last year. NPR named it one of the 10 Best Classical CDs for 2007.

Music in Iraq

2008-07-29T11:34:00.004-05:00

My SLSO colleague Marc Thayer (and here) recently returned from 3 weeks in Iraq, participating in a music academy organized by a group called American Voices, a nonprofit that focuses on cultural diplomacy. This is Marc's second summer trip over there. His emails back to the States last year were captivating, and this year is no different. I encourage everyone to read his posts and take heart that some things of beauty are happening over there. I'm looking forward to working with the two students who will be coming to St. Louis in a few weeks and will live with Marc and be involved with the SLSO.

An attempt at returning to blogging

2008-07-25T12:57:00.004-05:00

My deepest apologies for not blogging for quite a while. Life has been a bit "zoo-ey" - I'm rarely taking a lunch break at work (that's often when I blog, like now) and I've been so physically and emotionally exhausted at the end of the day that I just haven't had the energy to blog at home. The longer I wait, though, the harder it will be to restart since I always think I need to recap. But now, in the words of Inigo Montoya, "There is too much - let me sum up."

1. Feb., March and part of April I served as what I called "interim interim" VP for Development at the SLSO (read, all of the responsibility, none of the pay). We were in between interim VPs, waiting for our new executive director to arrive and hire a consultant to fill the role for 6 months or so. Someone had to keep the shop running so I volunteered, not knowing what I was getting myself into (ignorance is truly bliss). My co-workers were gracious to me as I stumbled through various things. I'm actually grateful that I got to "test-drive" the position as it clarified for me that I have NO interest in pursuing that job! I'm just not a fundraiser at heart like some of my colleagues are.

2. As mentioned above, the SLSO has a new executive director. As is the case whenever a new boss comes on board, he's full of energy while the rest of us are, to put it mildly, a bit fatigued. He has good ideas overall for the SLSO, I think. We'll see if things come together as quickly as he thinks they will/should. He's keeping us hopping.

3. Our little family was featured on the front page of the local Sunday paper on June 1. We are the very model of a modern average St. Louis family, it turns out. How nice that our average-ness (is that the same as mediocrity??) lands us on the front page! The way it happened is that the Post-Dispatch had a blurb on their website asking people whose household incomes were around $50k to contact the reporter. I emailed him with a little info on our situation. I ended up speaking with him by phone for 30-45 minutes, and he thought we sounded interesting enough that he and a P-D photographer followed us around for an afternoon. Originally he said that he was also talking to a few other families, though we had been the most forthcoming and cooperative so the article would probably feature us more prominently. Then the article came out and we were the ONLY family featured. A number of people have commented on how "brave" we were to bare our lives and souls to the press. I guess I don't have any inhibitions about talking about my salary or about life in general. Maybe it comes from trying to pry money from rich people all day long, that I want them to see how most people live. At the same time, I always need to remind myself that there are LOTS of people in St. Louis and around the world whose lives are much harder than ours.

4. Had a lovely vacation in MI at the beginning of June. My niece, Becky, graduated from high school. For those reading who were at our wedding, Becky was the flower girl. THAT's how much time has gone by! Ack! We enjoyed lots of family time at my sister's, then traveled over to Holland, MI, where I went to school. We stayed with my long-time friend Amber and her family in their beautiful home that her husband Tom built. They have 3 boys, which transported Emily to a near state of Nirvana! She especially enjoyed playing with Ian, Tom and Amber's youngest boy (age 6).

5. I've done lots of other traveling as well. Denver for 5 days in mid-June for the National Performing Arts Convention, and New York for 1 day in mid-July to meet with some national funders. Both were enjoyable trips. I had a wonderful evening all to myself in NYC and took in a fantastic Broadway play, Thurgood (also here), a one-man play about the life of Thurgood Marshall, the first African-American Supreme Court justice. I had heard about it on NPR and I'm so glad I went. It was fantastic. I now want to read a biography of Marshall - what a fascinating person. And Laurence Fishburne was brilliant.

6. On the home front, child care for Emily this summer has turned out to be a non-issue as Bruce has unfortunately not gotten many hours at the store. But they've had a good summer together. Also some friends with children Emily knows and likes (two from church, one from school) have offered to take Emily once/week so that Bruce can get some things done and so Emily can have that social outlet she desperately needs! And this week she's been at my parents', and the reports are that she has a long line of male conquests to which she adds daily!

That's all for now. I'll try to be more regular in the future.

Because we all need a laugh

2008-03-10T21:10:00.003-05:00

Ran across this hilarious article in the NY Times about the Really Terrible Orchestra. This should be mandatory reading for anyone who takes himself/herself seriously - especially musicians. I particularly like the anecdote about the "cellist" who was having a hard time remembering the tuning of the strings and had to write the notes down on the fingerboard!

A co-worker informed me that the writer, Alexander McCall Smith, has also written several books of fiction, which she greatly enjoys. She particularly recommends The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency.

"Joseph" sermon link

2008-02-25T15:25:00.002-06:00

Here's the link to Eric Mason's sermon from yesterday: http://www.journeyon.net/sermon/joseph-seeing-life-redemptively

Dude, it was DOPE! (OK, I'll stop trying to talk street...)

"Mase" was in the HOUSE!

2008-02-25T09:24:00.002-06:00

OK, that's about as "street" as I get! But we had a kickin' guest preacher at church yesterday - Eric Mason from Epiphany Fellowship in Philly. Epiphany is a sister church through the Acts 29 network. They've just been around for about 18 months and have already grown to about 350 people - 1/3 African-American, 1/3 white, and 1/3 "other". Eric, or "Mase" as he's sometimes called, is an amazing juxtaposition of street talk with deep theological thinking. In the same sentence he'll use 3 street terms followed by meanings of Greek and Hebrew words!

I'll post a link to his sermon when it's up on our church's website. Mase talked on Joseph (the Old Testament one) and how God is the ultimate "Iron Chef," making fantastic meals out of unexpected ingredients that are pretty nasty on their own! Was definitely something Bruce and I could relate to and apply at this point in our lives.

I guess everyone has their price

2008-02-22T16:20:00.003-06:00

I learned today that my esteemed workplace is participating in a promotion for a local radio station in which people apply to marry someone they've never met. You fill out an application which asks questions ranging from "Have you ever been convicted of a felony or misdemeanor?" to "If your friends described you as someone famous, who would it be and why?" The "Potential Bride" will be selected through some combination of the station personnel's selection process (described as "good faith judgment") and listener input. Then a "Potential Groom" will be selected in a similar fashion, but also with Potential Bride input. The Potential Bride and Groom have no personal contact until the wedding day. They meet the morning of the wedding. They also get a free house for one year and, appropriately, one year of free marital counseling!

How is my workplace participating? We're the wedding venue. That in itself is appropriate as it is a gorgeous facility (at least, the public parts are - the offices and backstage, not so much!) which has been used for many weddings. In return the radio station is giving us free publicity for some events/concerts.

I can't help but shudder at the thought that the SLSO will be facilitating this "social experiment," as the radio station is billing it, which, in my view, ranks up there with "The Bachelor" and "Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire." I know that we want to portray the SLSO as approachable and relevant to the everyday life of the average citizen, not to mention we need the money/promotional assistance, but do we have to do it this way?

Yes, other cultures have done arranged marriages for millennia, with a higher success rate than our Western way of falling "in" (and subsequently "out") of love. I think that success relies on the spouses being brought up to expect an arranged marriage and how that plays out. Those cultures also typically make divorce quite difficult. If you've grown up expecting, and culture promoting, romance and fireworks, as well as how relatively "easy" it is to get a divorce, I have a hard time believing this approach will work. Any bets on how long this marriage will last?

Music geek humor!

2008-02-20T14:09:00.001-06:00

Here's a funny for the day for all you classical music geeks out there:

A recent report now says that the Mozart effect is yet another charming urban legend. The bad news for hip urban professionals: playing Mozart for your designer baby will not improve his IQ or help him get into that exclusive pre-school. He'll just have to get admitted to Harvard some other way.

Of course, we're all better off listening to Mozart purely for the pleasure of it. However, one wonders whether, if playing Mozart sonatas for little Tiffany or Jason really could boost his or her intelligence, what would happen if other composers were played during the kiddies' developmental time?

LISZT EFFECT: Child speaks rapidly and extravagantly, but never really says anything important.

BRUCKNER EFFECT: Child speaks v-e-r-y slowly and repeats himself frequently and at length. Gains reputation for profundity.

WAGNER EFFECT: Child becomes a egocentric megalomaniac. May eventually marry his sister.

MAHLER EFFECT: Child continually screams - at great length and volume - that he's dying.

SCHOENBERG EFFECT: Child never repeats a word until he's used all the other words in his vocabulary. Sometimes talks backwards. Eventually, people stop listening to him. Child blames them for their inability to understand him.

IVES EFFECT: The child develops a remarkable ability to carry on several separate conversations at once, in various dialects.

GLASS EFFECT: The child tends to repeat himself over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.

STRAVINSKY EFFECT: The child is prone to savage, guttural and profane outbursts that often lead to fighting and pandemonium in the preschool.

BRAHMS EFFECT: The child is able to speak beautifully as long as his sentences contain a multiple of three words (3, 6, 9, 12, etc). However, his sentences containing 4 or 8 words are strangely uninspired.

CAGE EFFECT: Child says nothing for 4 minutes, 33 seconds - exactly.
(Preferred by 10 out of 10 classroom teachers.)

Shout out to my band!

2008-02-19T10:41:00.004-06:00

The SLSO traveled to Carnegie Hall last week and presented two different concerts. I unfortunately was not one of the chosen few who got to travel with them. They got rave reviews from NYC critics as well as our own. With all the challenges this organization has dealt with, I'm immensely proud to be affiliated with these talented musicians. Here are some links:

Demystifying Messiaen, With a Little Help From the Birds

'Dr. Atomic' premieres with a blast

Open Door to the Wilderness

Turangalîla triumphant

John Adams: Encore!

St. Louis Post-Dispatch on Turangalila

St. Louis Post-Dispatch on Dr. Atomic

For a behind-the-scenes view of the trip, complete with pics, go to the SLSO Blog.

Funny Emily

2008-02-19T10:34:00.003-06:00

For those who don't know, Emily is quite the drama queen. She'll pout and cry for dramatic effect, which we can laugh off if we haven't been battling her mood swings all day. Otherwise it's just irritating! Last night at dinner we were trying to get her to finish her spinach (which she loves, by the way). She said, "I can't eat my spinach because my heart is broken!" I burst out laughing! I guess we need to limit the number of fairy tales we read to her or let her watch on TV!

More fun to share

2008-02-19T09:58:00.004-06:00

I don't think I've mentioned on this blog how much our little family enjoys the books and music of Sandra Boynton. Many people don't know that they know her work through her very popular greeting cards, which were at their peak in the 1980's. Her most popular one is "Hippo Birdies Two Ewes," which you may recognize if you've bought at least one of the 10 million sold since 1975! We got introduced to her children's books through Bruce's brother Dean, who sent a stack of board books for Emily early on. They quickly became some of our favorites, and I frequently include a few whenever I go to a baby shower or toddler's birthday.

We then got introduced to her music through my dear friend, Marsha Graham. "Philadelphia Chickens" has got to be the wittiest, smartest and most musically interesting kids CD ever made! I don't get tired of listening to it, which is more than I can say of other kids CDs! I even got up the nerve to give it as a baby gift to the SLSO's Music Director, David Robertson, and his wife, Orli Shaham, on the birth of their twin boys in September. I thought I was a little crazy to suggest kids music to world-renowned musicians, but it turns out they were already Boynton fans but didn't know she had written music!

Anyway, here's a wonderful NY Times article on Sandra Boynton. Sounds like she has a wonderful perspective on life and work.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

2008-02-15T10:59:00.003-06:00

Life is never dull, it seems. Fortunately, this week there have been some GOOD changes, which, honestly, in itself is a change. It's been pretty grim here recently. First and foremost, Bruce has a job! He's working part-time for Kaehler Travelworks, a relatively high-end luggage store in an area mall. Fortunately, the items in the store are expensive enough that he's not tempted to spend the few dollars he's making to satisfy his bag fetish! Anyway, this is a HUGE answer to prayer.

Secondly, I'm the temporary development director for the SLSO. We're in between interims and needed someone to represent the dept at Senior Staff meetings and make final decisions on things. I'm calling myself the "Interim Interim." It's a good learning experience for me, and I'm enjoying the chance to be closer to the inner workings of the organization. And I'm hoping this may "prime the pump" for some future opportunities.

In less important news, but still momentous, Bruce shaved off his mustache! He did it in the middle of the night Tues/Wed when he couldn't sleep due to thinking about starting his new job. So when I woke up in the morning and he greeted me in the kitchen, it was a bit of a shock! He'd had the mustache since he was 16. Bruce's explanation: "It seemed like a good time to make a change." I'm still getting used to it, but it looks good. On Wed., Emily kept telling Bruce he needed to put his mustache back on - like he's Mr. Potato Head, I guess! Reminds me of the scene in Toy Story 2 when Potato Head is preparing to head out with Buzz et al to rescue Woody, who's been kidnapped. He pops on his mustache to look more serious and says, "Let's roll!" You can watch it here. It's around the 1:08 mark.

Sometimes I think my entire life could be summed up by lines from movies. I've been thinking about blogging that sometime.

Lolcats

2008-02-14T12:40:00.003-06:00

I found this hilarious website through, of all places, the St. Louis Business Journal. According to the BJ, the lesson of lolcats is, "Stay award of language that's evolving all around us. Unless we want to come off as fusty geezers, we should do what we can to improve our ears." As a professional grant writer who must cross every "t" and dot every "i", I'm sure I fall into fustiness! I was never "hip" to begin with, but in comparison with my younger, iPod-wearing, cell phone-texting, Facebook-networking co-workers, I think I'm officially downright nerdy.

Apart from the lesson the BJ wants us to learn from lolcats, you can have a lot of fun captioning funny pictures. It's also fun to read other people's captions - definitely good for a laugh when you need one. It's like a make-your-own "Bad Cat" book! I was also pleasantly surprised to scan through the first several pages of captioned pics without running into any truly tasteless captions.

Happy lolcatting!

Sharing some beauty

2008-02-07T15:26:00.000-06:00

A few days ago I pulled out a CD I hadn't listened to in a long time. I go through phases in my listening habits. For a while I'll just listen to talk radio (NPR and the local Christian radio station - talk about contrasts!), then I'll just listen to 80's pop, then Irish/Celtic, then classical, etc. It's been a while since I spent much time listening to what really is my favorite kind of music - a cappella choral music. The CD I pulled out is Illumina by the Clare College Choir. My two favorite tracks are #2 "Bring Us, O Lord God" by William Harris and #9 "Hymn To The Creator Of Light" by John Rutter. Both are performed exquisitely. The Rutter piece is, IMO, his most complex and beautiful composition. I was surprised to learn, after listening to it, that it was Rutter. Rutter can write some beautiful music (and also some incredibly inane music), but it's usually pretty straightforward. "Hymn To The Creator Of Light" is actually a double choir piece, and the harmonies are rich and complex. I had the good fortune to perform it 7 years ago, though I felt that the group I sang it with didn't do it justice. Anyway, I recommend clicking on the CD link above and listening to the samples on Amazon.com. Then I recommend buying it.

And yes, that's my review on the item page.

What the...??????

2008-02-05T17:10:00.000-06:00

Only in St. Louis can you get 8 inches of snow on Thursday, have a temp of 75 the following Monday, and temps in the 40's with a severe rain storm on Tuesday. No wonder seemingly half the area population is sick! Bruce and Emily both got the flu and were knocked flat for several days. Emily is pretty much over it, except for a hacking cough, but Bruce is still in the thick of it, only 2 weeks after FINALLY getting over his 5-week illness mid-Dec/Jan. They didn't get the stomach variety, which several of my co-workers got, but high fever alternating with chills, malaise, congestion, and cough. You know it's mean stuff when Emily is essentially flat on her back for almost 3 days! Fortunately, I've stayed healthy so far. Maybe it's because I got the flu shot and they didn't this year.

In recent happy news, I'm an aunt again! My brother, Kelvin, and his wife, Becky, welcomed Nathan Bradley into the world on Saturday, Jan. 26. All is well with them, PTL.

I'm off to play my part in Super Tuesday.

In search of contentment

2008-01-14T15:29:00.000-06:00

Our pastor preached an awesome sermon yesterday on contentment. Totally kicked our butts. Listen here. What I don't understand is how to be "content" when you know life is not as it should be, whether that's on a personal level or globally (this world is not our home). I guess that's where God's "peace that passes understanding" steps in, and "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" (Philippians 4:13). And how do you balance contentment/peace with striving for bigger goals - not in a workaholic or pride-ful way, but in terms of continual personal growth? I have answers in my head, but how to live it out - that's something else entirely.

Back to blogging (hopefully)

2008-01-14T15:04:00.001-06:00

The last 6 weeks have been rather crazy, both at home and at work. It's been impossible to find time to blog. Bruce is just now recovering from being sick for almost a month (sinus infection + cold + allergies), and I was sick with bronchitis before that. I think we can thank Emily The Walking Petri Dish for how sick we've been this academic year. Now that she's in pre-school, she's bringing home all kinds of germs, I guess. She of course has built up her immune system, but Bruce and I are quite susceptible. It's hard enough to keep up with her when we're healthy, let alone when we're sick!

Had a nice, low-key Christmas at Mom and Dad's. We usually spend Christmas in the odd-numbered years with the DeChambeau side, but we couldn't afford to fly all 3 of us across the country, rent a car, etc. However, since it was officially the "in-law year" for the Smiths, my brother and sister were with their in-laws. So it was just us and Mom and Dad. This was the first Christmas that Emily was really anticipating, which made it fun. However, she wasn't so excited that she couldn't sleep, which made it even better! She slept until 9:15 on Christmas morning! When she came into our room to wake us up (we were up late wrapping presents), I looked at Bruce and said, "This is probably the last Christmas we'll get to sleep in until 9:00 for a long time!"

Cute Emily story: For some reason, on Christmas Eve day, Emily got it into her head that we needed to call Santa on the phone. I don't know if she wanted to be sure that Santa knew we were at Grandmother and Granddaddy's house rather than our house, or what she was thinking. But she mentioned it periodically throughout the day. We put her to bed around 10 pm (9 Central, which is a typical bedtime for her), but she didn't go to sleep. We heard her playing in her room. Around 11:30 she wandered into our bedroom as we were wrapping presents. I marched her back into her room, telling her she needed to sleep, and she said, "You have to call Santa!" After some quick thinking, I said, "OK, but I can't call Santa until you're asleep because Santa won't come if you're awake." She said, "OK, " and crawled back into bed. Our room was next to hers so I went into our room and leaned against the adjoining wall. I then said rather loudly, "Brrrrrrrring, brrrrrrrring! Hello? Santa? Hi, we're here. You can come now. Emily's asleep! OK, bye." Bruce looked at me like I was a crazy person and said, "You need to work on your sincerity." I said, "I bet it'll work," and sure enough, she stayed in bed!

That's all for now. Now that I've done the first blog after the unintended hiatus, I'll try to be better about posting something regularly.

Strength in numbers

2007-11-29T09:25:00.000-06:00

Some work colleagues and I have joined together to start a staff-musician Bible study/fellowship group at the office. We had our first meeting yesterday, and it was a wonderfully encouraging time. I was designated to be the leader for this first gathering, and God led me to I Peter 3:8-17, which really encapsulates my desires for the group:

------------------------------------
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For,

"Whoever would love life
and see good days
must keep his tongue from evil
and his lips from deceitful speech.
He must turn from evil and do good;
he must seek peace and pursue it.
For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their prayer,
but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."

Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.

-------------------------------------------

We had 7 people - 3 staff, 4 musicians - at this first meeting, and there was real joy at being able to come together as believers and talk about how we can be good witnesses for Christ at work. Several others have expressed interest so it will hopefully grow. PTL!

DonorsChoose.org goes national

2007-11-19T09:24:00.000-06:00

I've had a link for DonorsChoose.org on this blog since I created it (the blog, not the organization!). I love the idea of people pooling their resources and directly helping teachers implement innovative ideas as well as meet schools' fundamental needs.

To date DonorsChoose.org has had limited reach to public schools in select states/districts. I saw an article this morning saying that DonorsChoose.org is now open to every public school in the country! So all you public school teachers out there can submit your ideas for funding, and the rest of us can find projects close to us to support. Power to the people!

More to smile about

2007-11-16T12:46:00.000-06:00

The symphony world is inundated with critics gushing about the Simon Bolivar Youth Orchestra from Venezuela. This is a truly remarkable orchestra comprising the cream of the crop of "El Sistema," the music education system in Venezuela which takes 250,000 kids each year from the slums and enrolls them in an intensive music education system. They're currently undertaking their first major US tour, which is why every day I'm seeing at least 2 articles about them. Add to that that their 26-year-old conductor, Gustavo Dudamel, who is a product of "El Sistema" and has been conducting the Simon Bolivar YO since he was 18, was recently named the next music director of the LA Phil and you have the classical music equivalent of a PR frenzy. The NY Times gushed about their Carnegie Hall debut so much that I felt like I really missed something special.

Found this YouTube video today of their signature piece - "Mambo" from Bernstein's Symphonic Dances from West Side Story. I had a smile on my face the whole way through. It makes me optimistic about the future of classical music. Hopefully we won't all have to move to Venezuela to experience it.

In a related article, read Greg Sandow's blog on the Berlin Philharmonic's recent Carnegie performance. Sounds like they were having as much fun as the SBYO!

Need a few laughs?

2007-11-16T11:37:00.000-06:00

Had a fun morning coffee meeting with a student from University of Missouri-St. Louis who is doing a paper on why the city of St. Louis, both the government and the citizens, should support the Saint Louis Symphony. He was very easy and fun to talk to - we had a great meeting of the minds! In the course of conversation, he reminded me of the hilarious YouTube video "Pachelbel Rant," in which a comedian complains about how he can't escape Pachelbel's Canon in D no matter what kind of music he listens to. I had to watch it again and once again had tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard!

Then a co-worker showed me this animated video on aging Baby Boomers, to the tune of "Born to Be Wild." Though I'm not a Boomer, it's still funny!

Laughter is the best medicine so have a healthy Friday!

Finally some Emily pics!

2007-11-15T00:42:00.000-06:00

I finally remembered to upload some recent pics of our Sunshine Girl. However, I had some trouble with the upload process (it's hard to do this with antiquated dial-up Internet!) so don't have the layout quite right. From top to bottom: first day of school, riding a horse at the Harvest Festival at the Shaw Nature Reserve, parrot on Emily's arm at St. Louis Pirate Festival (fun trivia: did you know parrots can live to be 80 or 90 years old???), and Halloween with church friends (Emily is on the right, dressed as Periwinkle the cat from Blue's Clues - she doesn't like hats and masks so we never got that part quite right!).

What am I - puce?

2007-11-13T12:23:00.000-06:00

Found an interesting study today commissioned by The Norman Lear Center. (For those who don't remember, Norman Lear is the irreverent creator and/or director of such TV shows as "All in the Family," "Sanford and Sons," and "Maude," and movies like "The Princess Bride" and "Fried Green Tomatoes.") This study shows trends of what people listen to, watch and read when juxtaposed with their political leanings. Respondents were tagged "red," "blue," or "purple" according to their survey answers. Once again, I find myself without a home - I'm not even purple! Well, I'm not purple in how it plays out in my media and entertainment choices. Here's a description of "purples" from the press release:
------------
THE “PURPLES”
People with “purple” entertainment preferences like all the broadcast networks and a lot of primetime programming, including police procedurals, game shows and reality programming. They watch a lot of Fox News and they like daytime and children’s programming more than other people. Moderates like to read non-fiction, including self-help books and biographies, but they like mysteries and thrillers best. Rock music is their favorite – they don’t like classical or folk music as much as other people. Their favorite video games are Mario, Donkey Kong and Madden NFL. They don’t seek out entertainment with political themes and they are far less likely to read books about politics or current events than other people. They are less likely than other people to think that they can predict a person’s politics based on their entertainment preferences.

...Our survey analysis shows moderates tend not to seek out entertainment with a political edge, so when they take a dose of politics, it may go down better when administered by such a non–political bona fide star.

...While 68% of liberals seek out entertainment that contains political themes and commentary, just 33% of moderates are the least likely to do so.

Not only are moderates much less likely than other groups to seek out entertainment with political themes. Compared to conservatives and liberals, they are three times less likely to read a book on politics or current events.
-----------------------

Where to begin? I don't like most of primetime programming, and I'd rather give myself a paper cut and pour lemon juice on it than watch Fox News. I tend not to like game shows (NPR's "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me!" is the main exception) or reality programming (exceptions - TLC's "What Not to Wear" and the now-defunct "Clean Sweep"). I DO prefer non-fiction - I like to think truth is indeed stranger than fiction! If by "daytime programming" they mean soap operas and celebrity talk shows, then I don't like that. Of course, I'm never home during the weekday so it's essentially a moot point. I love many politically oriented entertainment options, such as "Wait, Wait," "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," "The Colbert Report" and have enjoyed the political singing group the Capitol Steps. My family as a whole doesn't do a lot of quoting of movies or songs (though Bruce and I do it constantly - yes, we know, we're geeks!), but one thing we do quote often is the Vaughn Meader comedy album The First Family. And the book I'm currently attempting to read, in between work, family, church, singing, and sleep, is Doris Kearns Goodwin's excellent book on Abraham Lincoln and his Cabinet, Team of Rivals. And celebrity endorsements of social causes or political candidates hold very little water with me, unless I'm seen that particular celebrity to be especially ethical and intelligent. And of course, I love classical music.

A few weeks ago I attended a taping of the PBS show "Washington Week with Gwen Ifill." As we were waiting in line, we were given the opportunity to submit a question to pose to the panel in a special segment just for St. Louis broadcast. My question got selected among 10-15 others, but unfortunately Gwen never got to me in the 30 minute segment. (I got some good camera time, though! Check it out here.) My question was based on this issue, that no political party comes close to representing my views and the current roster of "third parties" are either single-issue focused or too extreme for me. I therefore want to know what it will take to develop and sustain a viable third party. It's getting increasingly difficult to be motivated to vote when you have to constantly judge who's the lesser of the evils.

Sometimes life really stinks

2007-11-07T13:26:00.000-06:00

I said in an earlier post that we were expecting a job offer for Bruce any day. He had 3 2-hour interviews with this prospective employer (a big-box office supply store), 2 with the person who would be his immediate supervisor and 1 with the store manager. Both said they wanted him to "join the team." He just had to pass the "pee-in-a-cup" drug test and they'd check his references. A couple of days after the interview with the store manager, he went to do the drug test. (The testing location was almost an hour away. We're surrounded by hospitals here. They couldn't let him use a closer lab??) The form he got indicated it would have to go to Virginia for processing.

It was a week before he heard back from them. As it turns out, his ADD medicine is a controlled substance and so the test came back as positive for amphetamines. (We knew, of course, that his med is controlled, but it didn't occur to us that it would impact the test.) The woman who called didn't immediately think Bruce was a druggie, fortunately. The first thing she said after saying he'd tested positive was, "Do you take Adderall?" That's exactly the med he takes! So then he had to go to Walgreen's and have his profile printed out and then fax it to the lab so that the lab could see that he indeed has been prescribed that med. You'd think that a national, big-box store would have these procedures in place to save time. Bruce had signed a release form when doing the test which should have waived all the privacy rules. (You medical people out there might understand better why that didn't take care of it.) Anyway, Bruce did that, then got another call from the lab saying they couldn't read part of it, could he please fax it again. He did so.

During this time, he had no contact with the store itself, figuring that the lab was communicating with them what the hold-up was. Turns out that wasn't the case. After everything got squared away with the lab, Bruce called the would-be supervisor to check on things. The guy said he thought Bruce had dropped off the map so he went ahead and hired two other people. ARGH!!!! I could go on and on about the various things that the store said that made this sound like a done deal, but there's no point. Evidently this isn't the place God wants him to be.

So we're back to square one for him. Very frustrating, and it's making it difficult for us to make Thanksgiving and Christmas plans. This is also impacting my own thoughts on future plans, which may need to be delayed. All of that combines to make my mood about as gray as the sky today.

BUT --

"God is good - all the time."

Encouraging philanthropy

2007-11-05T16:02:00.000-06:00

Ran across a heart-warming article today about a Seattle school district project which not only teaches students how a little adds up to a lot, but also teaches and empowers them to make philanthropic decisions. I'd like to start something like that in the St. Louis Public Schools. Although the vast majority of SLPS students are low-income, they can learn the blessings of helping others as well, rather than just being beneficiaries all the time.

Meeting me - again

2007-11-05T15:56:00.000-06:00

I'm going to be the featured staff person for the SLSO's Playbill in the month of December. Thought people might enjoy reading it, along with the accompanying photo:

Meet the Staff of the Saint Louis Symphony Orchestra

Stephanie DeChambeau Director of Institutional Giving

In the Middle of the Mitten: “I was born in Alma, Michigan, right in the middle of the mitten. My mother was a private music teacher. She could be an at-home mom and still supplement my father’s meager salary at a small liberal-arts college, where he taught Speech Communication. My earliest memories of classical music are falling asleep at Alma Symphony Orchestra concerts, in which my mom played clarinet.”

Nashville Cat: “My first aspiration was to be a contemporary Christian music singer. After I graduated from Hope College in Holland, Michigan, with a degree in religion and a music minor, I moved to Nashville. I saw the industry up close and saw people in bands I enjoyed delivering pizzas and selling real estate to make ends meet—that wasn’t so attractive, neither was the idea of living on the road.

“I also missed classical music. I gave up on the singing career, which was scary because I didn’t know what to do if I wasn’t a singer. I had no idea that orchestras had staffs. Eventually I got a job as the Nashville Symphony’s receptionist, moved to database administrator to overseeing telefunding and direct-mail campaigns.”

The Right Match: “We moved to St. Louis in 2000 so my husband could go to Covenant Theological Seminary, and the Symphony had just the right job open for me. I thought that if I was to stay in fund raising, grant writing would be best for my introverted personality. I’d never written a grant before but they took a chance on me.

“When you find the right match between a program and a prospective donor’s interest, you feel how worthwhile it all is. I’m very proud of getting a local children’s book distributor interested in our in-school programs, in which musicians use children’s books in their presentations. The company is now donating a book to every child who experiences one of these programs. The CEO is excited. The musicians are excited. The kids can all take away a book of their very own. It hits a sweet spot for everybody.”

Sunshine State: “Our daughter Emily is pure sunshine—when she’s not throwing a temper tantrum. She turns four this month. We sense we’ve produced another music nerd. When she was a little over a year old, we were eating supper with All Things Considered on the radio—and she sang the theme song, right on with the syncopation.”

The abortion debate

2007-11-02T09:03:00.000-05:00

I read a review this morning about a new documentary about the abortion debate. According to the review, "Lake of Fire" offers a balanced look at the issue, including the extremists on both sides. It sounds very graphic so I know I won't go see it. Dead/dying children stories, especially where the death is brutal, affect me a lot more now that I have my own child. If anyone out there goes to see the movie, I'd be interested in your opinions/thoughts.

"Genius" is in the eye of the beholder

2007-10-31T10:32:00.000-05:00

I ran across an interesting list yesterday - the top 100 living geniuses, as compiled by 4,000 Britons. It's a crazy list, and one that becomes more dubious the farther down you go. This is by no means scientific, as evidenced by the fact that 24% of the entrants are from Britain and another 36% are from the USA - hardly proportionate to the total population of those 2 countries, but not surprising when you only survey British people. I'm a bit appalled at how British papers are trumpeting this like it IS a scientific result. Some of the more interesting/eyebrow-raising honorees:

Matt Groening, creator of the animated series "The Simpsons" - #4!!!!
Brian Eno, film score composer - #15! (above conductor/pianist/political activist Daniel Barenboim, who's at #19)
Garry Kasparov, chess player - #25 (one above the Dalai Lama)
Mohammed Ali, Osama bin Laden and Bill Gates - all tied for #43!

The list quickly deteriorates into a celebrity popularity contest. Other weird entries include horror novelist Stephen King, George Lucas, Hans Zimmer, John Williams, Steven Spielberg, Quentin Tarrantino, Meryl Streep, Paul McCartney, JK Rowling, Dolly Parton, Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys, Aretha Franklin, Stevie Wonder and David Bowie. Also the fact that Steve Wozniak is on the list but not Steve Jobs (they co-founded Apple Computers) is very odd to me.

This makes me ponder how we overuse superlatives in today's society. For example, have you ever noticed how many organizations/companies claim to be "world-class"? I've seen this on bios of arts organizations I've never heard of which reside in 4th-tier metropolitan areas. It's like how the standing ovation has lost its meaning because everyone does it for every performance.

It seems to me that the term "genius" has gotten watered down to the point that anyone who makes a significant contribution to their field is automatically termed a genius. I've said in casual conversation that the pop singer Madonna is a "genius" because of her ability to reinvent herself and her musical style so she continues to be wildly successful 25 years into her career. But I don't really mean she's a true genius. (And I am by no means saying I approve of her or her music, though "it's got a good beat and I can dance to it.") One person quoted in the article states that a genius is someone who "turns conventional thinking on its head" and/or "turns the world we live in upside down." And genius can be used for good or evil. But "talent" does not equal "genius."

Who are your living geniuses? I'll ponder this and report back my top 10. I'd love to hear from others out there.

Everything and nothing

2007-10-24T15:09:00.000-05:00

Everything and nothing is happening around here. We're expecting Bruce to have a job offer any day, but silly things keep delaying it. Emily's teacher recently tested her for kindergarten-level skills (a full 2 years ahead of where she is) and Emily did very well. We'll learn more at this week's parent-teacher conference, assuming we EVER get info for signing up. Once again, in typical SLPS fashion, it's 24 hours before an event and we're still waiting for info. (It hopefully is coming home with Emily today.)

I'm contemplating some new possibilities of my own. I can't divulge yet on a public forum, but should know more in a couple of weeks.

Meanwhile, we've had an abnormally warm fall and have taken advantage, spending most of our weekends outside. Went to Eckert's Orchards and picked a pumpkin (apples were already gone by mid-October) and went on lots of rides. The next day we went to the Harvest Festival at the Shaw Nature Reserve. One of these days I'll remember to upload some pictures to the blog.

Last weekend Emily and I enjoyed something new and different for us. A friend and former SLSO colleague is serving as interim director of development for Music for All, which promotes music education and sponsors marching band competitions across the country. One of the regional competitions was in St. Louis last weekend, and my friend provided us with All-Access passes. It was actually my first time in the Edward Jones Dome, and I immediately got spoiled as Emily and I spent our time in a suite at the 50-yard line! We had a lot of fun. The performances were impressive - very elaborate steps for the musicians, multiple flags for the flag girls (didn't see any flag boys in this politically correct age), fancy uniforms/costumes for everyone, and even minimal sets/scenery. Each band had a theme for the set of music they performed. Emily especially liked one band that had a Chinese theme, mainly because the flag girls brought out a Chinese dragon and ran around with it for a while!

We've also spent lots of time at the park, getting in as much time as we can before it gets cold. Emily always manages to endear herself to at least one new child - usually an older child - every time we go. She is absolute sunshine.

Inspiration

2007-10-11T11:31:00.000-05:00

Ran across this article today, which gave me hope and inspiration:

Get that teacher an apple:

'SHE REALLY BELIEVES' | High school dropout with Ivy League education wins $25,000 award for innovative teaching methods

Where does that kind of dedication and optimism come from, if you're not a Christian??? I'm not saying she isn't - the article doesn't indicate one way or another. I'm just wondering in general. This woman is a model of selflessness, love and generosity.

Definitely NOT a teenager!

2007-10-08T11:01:00.000-05:00

Last Friday we got a little insight into how Emily's feeling about school. It's been such a big shift for all of us and it's hard to get much info out of her, so we were glad to find out a bit more indirectly.

As we were on our way to school Friday morning, Emily vomited all over herself and the car. I turned the car around and headed back to the house. In the past, when she's gotten sick like this, she's been pretty freaked out and starts crying. This time, she said something like, "I need to get cleaned up before I can go to school." I said that if she was sick, she wouldn't be able to go to school. THAT'S when she started crying, sobbing, "I want to go to school!" In the clean-up process at home, Bruce figured out that she'd had some bad milk (I'll spare you the gory details) and she wasn't really sick. She seemed fine after ridding her body of the offending matter, running around the house and eating some toast. So I took her to school.

About 90 minutes later I got a call at my office from one of her teachers saying that Emily had spit up twice at school. However, Emily had made it quite clear to the teacher that she didn't want to go home! She also wouldn't let the teacher change her shirt (eeeewwww!). The teacher again confirmed that Emily didn't have a fever or any other symptoms of being sick so she said that I didn't have to come get Emily, especially since Emily didn't want to go home. She was just calling to keep us informed. I figured Emily was fine so we left her at school. We didn't get any other calls that day.

So all of this was a confirmation that Emily is greatly enjoying school, for which we are very grateful. All of her classmates greet her enthusiastically when I drop her off in the morning. I wish I could observe her in the classroom without her being able to see me.

Tomorrow is picture day at school. Here's hoping she'll sit still long enough for the photographer to take a picture!

APB for "Kitty"

2007-10-02T15:55:00.000-05:00

Has anyone seen "Kitty" (in picture at right)??? We lost him/her at the Forest Park Balloon Race a few weeks ago. Bruce's mom gave it to her a couple of years ago and doesn't remember where she got it, and we neglected to write down "make and model" info (something a parent should always do for beloved toys) to facilitate replacing it. It's actually a little tough to tell if "Kitty" is really a cat, bear or mouse. We decided it was a cat. It's a loosely filled bean-bag animal. Doesn't make any sounds or anything special, but it's floppiness makes it fun to play with.

Emily actually has been handling the loss better than Mommy and Daddy! (Mommy is flashing back to being 5 years old and forgetting her Raggedy Ann doll at some European hotel until the family was 6 hours removed from the hotel. Therapy hasn't quite remedied that!) Let me know if you see something similar.

Blogosphere welcome!

2007-10-01T10:16:00.000-05:00

A quick "shout-out" to my girlfriend Amber, who has joined the blogging clique ("everybody's doing it"!). Check her out here. She's the mom of 3 boys - you know she's got stuff to say! You go, girl!

Beefing up my Google hits

2007-10-01T09:00:00.000-05:00

Rechargeables put energy back in the battery market

I'm proud to say that I made the front page of the Sunday Business section yesterday! Not that I had anything profound to say, but it's still fun. And I certainly wasn't sought out as an expert. I just responded to a blanket call on the Post-Dispatch website asking if anyone in the cyber-world used rechargeable batts.

As a plug for St. Louis, I'll note that my preference is Energizer, which was true even before we moved here. We just find they last longer, and not just because the Energizer Bunny says so!

The role of "good" music in church and society

2007-09-24T13:35:00.000-05:00

Check out this NY Times article: Does Simple Music Form Simple Faith?

Not bad - Bernard Holland and I seem to share some common musings! This is a thought-provoking article, which happens to coincide with my own observations about orchestras and churches. Why are the majority of churches which hold to traditional/classical music also the ones who are losing members, while the churches using contemporary music are for the most part growing by leaps and bounds? Yes, there are exceptions to any sweeping statement like that, but on the whole this seems to be the case.

Mr. Holland promotes the idea that today's music audiences and religious congregations want something that's knowable. Churches have emphasized the imminence of God in the last several decades in order to encourage congregants to experience a personal relationship with Him rather than just seeing Him as a distant dictator. The Jesus Movement of the late 60's/early 70's picked up on this, which led to the incorporation of popular music into church services (though adapting folk tunes for use in church had been going on since the Reformation). I can also testify to the "knowability factor" with symphony audiences. The most effective tool in symphony donor relations is access to the musicians. Also the SLSO Blog is very popular with people across the country. People like those "behind-the-scenes" glimpses which make them feel like they're part of an insider's club.

I particularly like the fact that Mr. Holland affirms my own premise about 20th century composers in my previous post:

"One reason classical music struggles as it does today lies with the several generations of composers in the last century who demanded that audiences understand them rather than the other way around."

The evolutionary process of orchestras

2007-09-21T10:27:00.000-05:00

My favorite arts blog is Artful Manager, written by Andrew Taylor, Director of the Bolz Center for Arts Administration at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. I would love to get my MBA in Arts Admin from this guy. Yesterday he blogged about a fascinating topic: Evolution vs. adaptation vs. ultimate good. The central premise was this quote from a book titled Culture and Prosperity by John Kay:

Evolution favours what is good at replicating itself, rather than what is good. This fundamental distinction is essential to understanding any evolving system.

Extrapolating this into the arts world poses an interesting dilemma for arts organizations. The determining factor of what survives in the world is not what is ultimately "best" (in artistic terms, "excellence" or the over-used "world-class"), but what adapts most effectively to the environment in order to replicate itself. In the case of arts organizations, "replication" entails staying relevant to new generations. What is traditionally held as "best" or "excellent" may be what drives an organization into its grave because society as a whole no longer shares that opinion. In the case of orchestras, are we so determined to stick to our traditional ways that we'll push the art form into extinction? What good will that do anyone?

This has particular poignancy for the SLSO. Ticket sales have dropped precipitously in the last 3 years, and no one really knows why. My guess is that it's a combo of local and national factors, ranging from the decline of arts education in schools over the last 30 years (which discourages the younger audience) to high ticket prices (which discourages anybody under a certain income threshold) to the increase in contemporary programming by our Music Director (which discourages the traditional audience). Also, 20th century composers are at fault, IMO, for being so cranial in their compositions and considering tonality "beneath" them. That movement happened at exactly the wrong time because it coincided with the decline in arts education. So the need for in-depth musical understanding happened at the same time the students received LESS music education. Now orchestras are caught in a no-win situation: if they keep playing the same old stuff (Mozart, Beethoven, maybe get radical with a little Stravinsky), they become irrelevant, dusty museums of music by "dead white guys." They may sell more tickets in the short run (the SLSO's "Beethoven" year had the highest ticket sales the organization had had in years), but pretty soon people will say, "Do I really need to hear Beethoven's Fifth again??" But 20th century composers created for themselves a reputation for eschewing audience approval, taking an "eat your vegetables" approach to audience development, so that when most people above age 40 don't recognize a composer's name on the concert ad, they run as fast as they can in the other direction. Add to that the fact that the SLSO's marketing budget is now 27% LOWER than it was in 2001, without factoring in inflation, and you have a ticketing disaster scenario.

The SLSO isn't the only major orchestra fighting this battle. What's the answer? Whatever it is, my guess is that it will necessitate a radical transformation of orchestra operations and programming. I would put my money on niche series programming: a traditional classics series that has next to no music written after 1910, an avant-garde series which also includes a lot of conductor commentary and increased visual aids, another series which blends the two (which is sort of what the SLSO is doing now), some unusual special events (Lord of the Rings Symphony, orchestra with rock bands like Metallica), probably pops, and maybe more. Ticket prices will have to drop significantly to be competitive with other art forms and entertainment forms. There will be a lot more high-end adult education. I don't think it's coincidental that enrollment in the SLSO's Symphony A to Z program has more than doubled for its 2nd year. Last year 45 people did the fee-based monthly class. We're currently at over 100 and still enrolling people.

Can this structure sustain a full-time, full-complement orchestra at the salaries currently being paid by the major orchestras? I'd be surprised. But now that society is questioning whether orchestras are worth preserving, we can't maintain status quo. As they say in 12-step programs, "Our best thinking got us here."

Let's stir things up!

2007-09-17T11:05:00.001-05:00

Read an interesting article this morning arguing that small orchestras may be the wave of the future because they're much more feasible. Having worked for a full-time orchestra for the last 7+ years, I can definitely see several advantages - only pay musicians when you actually use them, which would then lead to greater flexibility in scheduling and programming. (Not much incentive for big orchestras to program chamber music when they still have to pay all 90+ salaried musicians.) There's then MUCH less overhead, making it much easier for the organization to contain costs and adjust if there's a blip in ticket sales and/or donations.

The downside I immediately see is that only large metropolitan areas could supply high-quality musicians on a contractual basis. The musicians would have to piece together enough other work (teaching, free-lance work) to make a decent salary. That's easy enough in New York and Los Angeles and my former stomping grounds of Nashville, but not in St. Louis. Musicians would then be forced to spend a lot of time on the road, doing "gigs" here and there to make ends meet. Who wants to do that? I'm sure the orchestra quality would quickly decrease because 1) the best musicians will flock to the big cities where they can more easily piece together a living wage, 2) musicians will spend much more time traveling and thus not be practicing, and 3) the musicians will be tired from all the traveling and therefore not be at their best for rehearsals and performances. It's also dangerous to spend all that time on the road, as discussed here. [Disclaimer: although the link directs you to a certain blog, which I will not name so that the blogger doesn't discover me talking about him, please note that I do NOT support many/most of his opinions. I'm already on his "black list" for challenging his objectivity on multiple occasions.]

As the entertainment industry continues to evolve in today's fast-paced, electronically crazed, arts-challenged world, arts organizations, and especially orchestras, will have to revamp their structures and MOs to be economically viable and sustainable.

Getting back in the blogging swing of things

2007-09-14T10:15:00.000-05:00

In an effort to get restarted on the blog, I'm going to forego doing a "catch-up" kind of post. Just don't have the time for it. Suffice it to say that, after a difficult first 2 weeks, Emily (and Mommy and Daddy) is adjusting to preschool. Here are some cute stories:

1. A few days ago, as we were walking into the school, a boy classmate of Emily's got off the bus and yelled, “Hi Emily!” She turned around, saw him, and said, “Hi Reggie!” and got very giggly and excited! It was really cute. Then we walked into the gym where they line up in their classes, and Emily and Reggie sat down behind another boy. As I was getting Emily situated, Reggie said to me, “Emily has a boyfriend!”, pointing to the other boy. I asked him if he was Emily’s boyfriend and he looked a little sheepish! Very funny. Can’t believe that’s already starting!

2. Bruce went to the first PTO meeting last night and was able to get more feedback on how Emily is doing. Her asst teacher told a wonderful story. Yesterday, as Emily's class was entering the music classroom, the music teacher had some music playing on the CD player. Emily immediately said, "That's Bach!" Her classroom teacher was stunned and looked at the music teacher, who nodded that Emily was correct. A conversation ensued in which Emily said her mommy worked for the Symphony. Her teachers, of course, thought she meant that I was an orchestra musician, which Bruce then clarified. But we didn't even know she had figured out that I work for an orchestra! I joked with Bruce that she had figured it out from my reading the book "Zin! Zin! Zin! A Violin!" to her. Toward the end of the book, after it introduces all the instruments and they're all playing together onstage, there's the following stanza:

The strings all soar, the reeds implore,
The brasses roar with notes galore.
It's music that we all adore,
It's what we go to concerts for.

Sometimes, when I think of it and feel especially silly, I'll change the last line to "It's what Mommy raises money for!" I'm sure that's what helped Emily put it all together! Oh, and I'm guessing that she knew Bach from her Baby Einstein "Baby Bach" video. Anyway, that story made us proud of our already geeky daughter!

More later on other topics...

Yes, we're alive!

2007-08-28T15:47:00.000-05:00

Sorry I haven't had a chance to blog about Emily's foray into pre-school. We're all adjusting to the new schedule - early to bed, early to rise. She had 2 full days, then had 3 half-days in a row due to the heat. Only 70% of St. Louis City schools have air conditioning (fortunately, Emily's does have a/c) and with heat advisories inching toward 110 last week, they closed the schools late morning Wed-Fri. In true St. Louis Public Schools efficiency, in order to make the bus routes run correctly, they have to close ALL schools regardless of whether or not they have a/c.

Anyway, those 3 half-days were helpful in transitioning Emily into the idea of school, but wreaked havoc on our body clocks. Emily would be ready for a nap late in the afternoon (there is a 90-minute rest period at school after lunch) because she hadn't been as active in just a half-day at school, which then meant she wasn't ready for bed at a time that would enable her to get up at 6:45 a.m. the next day. Argh.

More later.

ANUNA!

2007-08-16T10:55:00.000-05:00

My very observant mother noticed that the Indianapolis PBS station was airing a special on Anuna, an Irish choir that I've loved from afar for 10 years. She taped it and sent it to me (thanks, Mom!). I watched about the first 20 minutes and then the PBS station launched into its first fundraising pitch of the program (it's pledge-drive time, of course). I started to fast-forward through it, then thought, "I'd like to hear what they have to say about Anuna. I'll bet they've never heard them before now." In the midst of their yakking, all of a sudden one of the hosts said, "Stay tuned for info on how you can get tickets to hear Anuna live!" At first I'm thinking, "Are they giving away a trip to Ireland?" Anuna has only done one brief US tour, which was 4-5 years ago. They didn't come anywhere near St. Louis, though I've been emailing Michael McGlynn for years telling him that St. Louisans love choral music and there's a large Irish contingent here.

Anyway, when I heard that, I immediately turned off the TV and ran to the computer to get on the Internet. Lo and behold, Anuna is doing a 41-city US tour beginning in October based on the special that's running on PBS right now. Once again, they're completely skipping St. Louis, for which I can probably blame our lame-o PBS station, which is NOT running the program. But we'll figure something out. We'll try to work out going either to the Indy or Nashville show.

I can't emphasize enough to everyone out there: GO EXPERIENCE THIS GROUP! Some of you may be familiar with them and not even know it. Anuna was the original choir for Riverdance. Their music really crosses multiple musical genres - Celtic, choral, religious, jazz. You can hear and watch clips at their website. Also, go here to see if your PBS station is broadcasting the program. Tape or Tivo the show and fast-forward through the fundraising appeals (unless you have a PBS station that's worth supporting!) - it's worth it! You'll start to understand why I've wanted to move to Dublin to join this group!

The one downside is that the group will be performing mostly in large, generic, performing arts centers. I think the Anuna experience would be best in a Gothic-style church or another small-ish venue like the Sheldon Concert Hall here in St. Louis. But I've waited 10 years to see/hear them in person so I won't complain too loudly!

GO! GO! GO! GO!

St. Louis Public Schools, Complaint #1

2007-08-15T13:14:00.000-05:00

Emily starts pre-school next week, attending a magnet pre-school through the St. Louis Public Schools. The SLPS is a disaster, having run off 6 superintendents in the last 4 years. The School Board, regardless of new people being elected over the 7 years we've been here, continues to be an ongoing power struggle, and the unprofessional antics of School Board members is absolutely appalling. This all culminated in the SLPS losing its accreditation this summer. Obviously, we're hoping that by the time Emily starts kindergarten, we can get her out of the SLPS one way or another. That means money, however, as the loss of SLPS's accreditation has brought to light a problem with Missouri law which ostensibly allows parents to transfer their children to an adjoining district at the expense of the original district: the adjoining district can refuse to take them.

Well, the problems aren't just with the bigwigs. Over the last several weeks, we've gotten increasingly concerned that we hadn't received any information about how we needed to prepare for the start of school, such as school supplies, pick-up/drop-off info, uniform, even actual registration. I gave the District our new address a month ago, and I left a msg at our specific school a week or so later to make sure they also had the info - to which I never received a call back. Yesterday Bruce was finally able to talk to a live person. The conversation was a telling glimpse into the World of SLPS:

Bruce – “We haven’t received any information about the first day of school.”

School Contact – “Yeah, we didn’t have time to do that with the move and everything.” (The building that normally houses the pre-school and its related elementary school is getting a new heating/cooling system so the entire school is moving to another building for the year.)

Bruce – “Does the school have a website where I can get information about what we need to do for the first day?”

School – “No, but you can get that info at this Friday’s open house.”

Bruce – “What open house?”

School – “We’re having an open house on Friday where you can get info about the first day of school.”

Bruce – “Did you send something out announcing that?”

School – “No, we didn’t have time.”

Bruce – “Then how was I supposed to know about the open house?”

School – “You just have to call.”

Bruce – “I’m supposed to know I have to call you to find out about an open house I didn’t even know was happening?”

School – [silence]

To sum up the rest of the conversation, they're "hoping" to have the teacher assignments done in time for Friday's open house (hello, school starts MONDAY!), they don't know where we should bring Emily at the beginning of the school day or where we pick her up, the person on the phone couldn't give us the First Day of School Requirements, and I can't remember what else. We did at least learn that the school uniform is blue or khaki pants and a white shirt. So I guess we'll be joining the herds of procrastinators buying school supplies at Target this weekend. Grr.

I've titled this post "Complaint #1" because I have a feeling this will be a running series in the next 9 months.

The love of money...

2007-08-07T15:33:00.000-05:00

In reading news articles for work, I ran across this in the NY Times. It broke my heart to read of otherwise very smart adults who are ensnared by peer pressure. Talk about a mission field. As I shared with my fundraising co-workers, this explains why efforts by charitable foundations to help nonprofits raise money from the dot-com millionaires have failed.

It's official - we have a little girl (not a baby)!

2007-08-07T13:01:00.000-05:00

On Sunday we bade goodbye to Emily's crib, loaning it to some friends expecting their first baby in September. We "asked" Emily if she would share it with the new baby, and she said that was a "good idea." Bruce took the crib to our friends' house while I took Emily shopping for new sheets for her "big girl bed." While we were shopping, I got a little nervous because Emily started saying she wanted to sleep in her "baby crib" and not in the "big girl bed." But when I showed her some sheet sets with Dora the Explorer and the Disney princesses, she changed her tune! Then when we got home and she went into her bedroom that no longer had a crib in it, she exclaimed, "What happened???" which made me nervous again. But I reminded her that we were sharing the crib with the new baby, and she didn't get upset. The transition to a twin bed has gone remarkably smoothly, considering how soon it happened after our move.

Then last night we had a sort of spiritual break-through! As we were praying before supper, I was thanking God for the air conditioning in our house during this heat wave and praying for people who were less fortunate. Emily interrupted, saying, "Can you pray for the worms?" I had no idea what she was talking about, but I prayed for the worms, asking God to help them get to their homes in the ground where it's cool, which was the only thing I could think of to pray for. When I finished, Bruce was looking at me with his mouth wide open and tears in his eyes. He asked me if I knew the story behind her request, and I said no. He motioned for me to follow him out of Emily's earshot. We went into another room, and he said that during the afternoon, when playing outside in the backyard, Emily spotted a dead, dried-out worm on the sidewalk. She asked Bruce what was wrong with it, and Bruce said that the worm was dead, probably because it got too hot. So that's what prompted her to pray for the worms! It was one of those golden moments that encouraged us that, despite the whining and self-centeredness that is so prevalent with her these days, some spiritual lessons are starting to sink in. One of her favorite Bible stories to read at night recently is based on Matthew 25:31-45, which is the parable of the sheep and the goats. In Emily's Bible storybook, it emphasizes that we can show love for Jesus by taking caring of sick people, giving people clothes to wear and food to eat, and visiting people in jail. We've read that almost every night for the last 3 weeks or so. Then I end our story time with prayer, which I try to connect with the stories we've read that night. So that may have played a role in this episode as well.

If we can develop empathy in her at an early age, we'd be THRILLED! We've been really struggling with teaching her that people can't/won't always do what she wants to do. We have to think about what other people want. Her response is almost always, "But I want to." Laying down our own desires in view of others' needs is a lifelong learning process. Hopefully Emily is starting down that road.

Blogged

2007-08-01T13:30:00.000-05:00

I was anonymously featured on the Saint Louis Symphony blog yesterday. I would rather have my droll sarcasm or thoughtful insight about the symphony business publicized to the world, but oh well!

And no, Emily doesn't have any Teletubbies videos. Nor do we own "Howard's End," for that matter. "A Room With a View" is the only E. M. Forster movie we own. But it's still a funny anecdote!

An Evening of Celebration

2007-07-31T22:51:00.000-05:00

Continuing in the same emotion as the previous post, we enjoyed a lovely evening at home with no worries of Psycho Neighbor intruding. We used our grill for the first time in a year, and Emily took great delight in splashing Mommy with water from her wading pool. And it was an amazingly mild evening for this time of year. The only drawback was we couldn't find the bug spray!

Here's to many more untainted memories in the months to come!

Free at last!

2007-07-31T16:59:00.000-05:00

Thank God Almighty, we're free at last!

Got the last of our stuff out of our old apartment last night and did our walk-through with the old landlord today. God willing, we will never have to have contact with anyone having to do with that property again! Neither the landlord nor I made any mention of the circumstances necessitating our move. I think she was about to as I was about to leave (Bruce didn't go - still WAY too angry about the whole thing), but then changed her mind. I was all business with her, where in the past I've been chatty in an effort to forge a relationship. I think she noticed the difference and figured if she brought up The Subject, she'd be subjected to a deluge of criticism. She'd be right in that assumption! I'd planned out lots of things to say in case The Subject presented itself. But it didn't, which I suppose is just as well.

So now we can really focus on settling into our new place. Despite getting rid of 2 SUVs full of stuff for the Refuge of Nations yard sale AND throwing away lots of paper (finally trashed 95% of my notes from my college religion classes!), we still have WAY more stuff than we should have. We didn't purge everything we could have - just ran out of time. Bruce made some good strides in purging, getting rid of hundreds of cassette tapes and CDs and suggesting that we sort through our Christmas decorations (something we didn't have time for). He also suggested we get rid of our fax machine, to which I said no. Don't want to lose our ability to fax documents. Really want an all-in-one printer/scanner/fax/copier to save space, but all in good time.

Unfortunately Bruce didn't get rid of ANY theology books - ARGH! I also still need to sort through baby clothes as we really have more than we need. Can maybe make a few bucks through consignment at Kangaroo Kids.

Also have a lot of electronics to recycle (or "e-cycle," as it's sometimes called) which we didn't have time to tote around to various locations. Also need to finish removing all personal information from the old computers. Hopefully this continued purging will open up more room in our cramped little house.

Easy ways to support your favorite charities

2007-07-27T12:19:00.000-05:00

As a follow-up to my Stewardship post, I am creating another group of links to direct people to good and easy ways to support various charities. One that I particularly like is GoodSearch.com. It's an Internet search engine. All you have to do is pick a charity to benefit from your searches, and then every time you use GoodSearch.com to search the Internet, it generates money for the charity. Easy, right? And it's not YOUR money going to the charity, it's Corporate America. GoodSearch.com donates a minimum of 50% of its advertising revenue to charities. From what I can tell, GoodSearch's annual distributions to charities are based on the number of searches performed by people who have designated that charity as the beneficiary. GoodSearch estimates that it works out to about a penny per search. Go to www.goodsearch.com to learn more.

Those of you in Schnucks Markets territory can also designate a portion of your grocery bill at Schnucks to go to the nonprofit of your choice. The signs in the stores emphasize giving to schools, but any nonprofit is eligible. Go here for more info.

Let me know of other innovative ways you know of to support worthy charities.

Stewardship

2007-07-25T22:05:00.000-05:00

Got a thought-provoking email from my sister a few days ago, in which she described a 2-part study she'd prepared for her adult Sunday school class on stewardship. This is a potent topic for me both personally and professionally. On the personal side, I believe that Christians should be leaders in philanthropy (the 10% tithe should be a minimum, not a maximum) and wise financial management ("Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another" - Romans 13:8); as a fundraising professional, it's my job to help people, regardless of their religious persuasion, see the benefits of parting with a portion of their wealth to help others. The media does stewardship such a disservice by focusing on people like Bill Gates and Warren Buffett because it feeds the general idea that the average Joe/Jill can't make a difference. I remember fighting this mentality here at the SLSO after the organization received a well-publicized $40 million challenge grant from a private family. I would talk to SLSO patrons who were so apologetic that they couldn't give as much as the Taylors. Without referencing the story of the widow's mite (Luke 21:1-4), I kept telling people, "If everyone gives in proportion to their ability, the SLSO will be just fine."

But here's the rub: how do we define our "ability" to give? Do we first decide how much money we need to be "happy" (which is never a finite amount), spend that amount and most likely more, and give out of the excess/remainder? Or do we determine our giving priorities and adjust our lifestyle accordingly? In both instances, we must scrutinize our life and determine what is "necessary" for living. But our motivation for giving and how that intersects with our inner priorities will greatly impact our lifestyle. For example, Bruce and I do not have cell phones, high-speed Internet, or cable TV. We wish we had all of those things, but they simply don't fit into our budget as it currently stands. Every time we get a flyer in the mail telling us of some new low-priced plan, we face a decision: we could "afford" it if we gave less than the tithe and/or we put more things on credit cards. But we have already established that our family is committed to giving at least 10% of our income away each year, and we want to pay off the debt we currently have and avoid incurring additional debt. So until we have more income, those things are not an option for us.

I don't mean to boast about our decisions. It's actually easier for us to make these decisions when we have less money. As a family of 3 living on one nonprofit income in a metro area, there's not much wiggle room. On the other hand, there are things we've decided we "can't live without" that, if the truth were told, we really could. Certainly billions of people in the world, including thousands in St. Louis, live without central a/c. As we were looking for a new home, that was a deal-breaker for us. Should we have gone without, freeing up maybe $50-$100/month which could then be given to charity (or pay off our debt, then given to charity)? Maybe. I don't think God has called us to do that as of yet, for which I am thankful! He may call some people to do that, just like Jesus called the rich young man to sell all his possessions and follow him (Matthew 19:16ff). Jesus doesn't say the same thing to everyone - rather, he focuses in on whatever "idol" is in the person's heart, the thing(s) the person values more than God.

Hopefully Bruce will be employed in the near future, and then we'll have to make decisions on how to live responsibly with that additional income. Do we immediately get cell phones, high-speed Internet, and cable TV? Since we've learned to live on less, our concept of what is "necessary" is different than earlier in our marriage when we were DINKs (Double Income No Kids). But does it mean that those things are wrong for Christians? I don't think so. As I write this, I hear our old pastor, Scotty Smith at Christ Community Church, saying, "Where is your heart? What holds your heart?" If those things impede my relationship with God, my family, and/or other much more worthy things in my life, then it would be sinful to have them. If we spend hours on end surfing the 'Net and watching worthless TV, then we would be wise to discontinue those services and dedicate those funds to a more constructive purpose. We also need to be constantly tuned into God's leading. Maybe God will bring something to our attention that needs financial support and it would require us to give something up.

I remember a career seminar I attended near the end of my senior year in college in which the person leading essentially said that a driving factor in choosing a career should be the kind of lifestyle we want to live. Call me an idealist, but I found that rather appalling, especially at a supposedly Christian college. I don't know many people who don't want to live as comfortably as possible, but it certainly sounded to me like the seminar leader was elevating money above family, calling, and gifting. Sure, I'd like to make a lot more money than I do currently, but I know I wouldn't be happy selling the latest widget. And I spend too many hours working to not be happy at what I'm doing (though I would be the first to say that not every day will be a happy work day, regardless of where you work!).

To remind us all of how blessed we are, here are some statistics, courtesy of the ONE Campaign:

One person in seven has no access to clean water for drinking, cooking or washing.
Every year, 10 million children die before their fifth birthday, nearly all of them from preventable causes.
Around the world, one person in seven goes to bed hungry each night.
Around the world, 77 million children do not go to grade school because their parents cannot afford fees, books or uniforms for all their children.
Nearly 1 billion people live in substandard housing without clean water or adequate sanitation, including more than 14 million refugees and internally displaced people living in tents or other temporary shelters. If no serious action is taken, the United Nations reports that the number of slum dwellers worldwide will rise over the next 30 years to nearly 2 billion.

Hopefully we can all keep these things in mind as we consider what is "necessary" for our daily lives.

Returning to life

2007-07-23T17:39:00.000-05:00

Last week was The Big Move, which is why there was no posting going on. It went about as well as a move can go, thanks to a small but hearty band of folks who helped us with packing and moving. Donated 2 SUV-loads of stuff to the Refuge of Nations yard sale and I still couldn't believe all the stuff we had to move. The only obstacle was we couldn't get our computer desk into the basement so it's now sitting in the garage, waiting for me to try to sell it on Craigslist. Still have a few odds and ends to move to the new place, plus the cleaning, but the worst is over. Our new place (a rental, single-family house) has less living space, which means we have to get creative with use of space, but we've been enjoying making as much noise as we want without worrying about anyone else in the house.

After receiving multiple emails last week from the downstairs neighbor in which she threatened to involve her attorney, we finally told her (via email) that we will no longer communicate directly with her. If she wants to contact us, she may do so through her attorney. Funny, it's been strangely quiet... What a blessing to move away from this oppressive atmosphere. But what will she have to occupy her time once she can't make our lives miserable? Oh yes, there will be a new tenant to terrorize. Maybe then the landlord will finally understand that WE are not the problem. (Monetary compensation for forcing us to move, rather than the true offender, would be very welcome!)

Emily has been enjoying time with my parents over the last several days, which has been a tremendous help in letting us focus on all we needed to do. Her favorite cousin, my 14-year-old nephew Paul, went to visit them at the same time so she was the center of 3 people's attention rather than just 2! Hog heaven! Needless to say, she's been having WAY more fun than we have! They went to the Indy Zoo, where she saw a dolphin show, elephant show, and got to touch a shark. She returns home tomorrow, which is just in time as Mommy and Daddy are missing her. ("Ain't no sunshine when she's gone...")

I'm sending out an email with our new home contact info (new address AND new phone number). If you don't get one, contact us through the Profile page.

Time for more unpacking.

Standing in the Need of Prayer

2007-07-11T13:17:00.000-05:00

Can't write much, but suffice it to say we are in desperate need of prayer. Things continue to escalate with our neighbor to the point where we're fearing for our safety. Our landlord refuses to get involved and just complains about how we're inconveniencing her. For our own sanity, we need to get out of our current place NOW, but how do we do that?? Emily is absorbing the stress - I don't know what time she went to sleep last night. I handed her off to Bruce around 1:30, and I know he had to deal with her after that. I broke down this morning in a meeting with my boss and my boss's boss (aka Head Honcho). I can hardly put two thoughts together. Don't know what to do. Anyone out there reading this, PLEASE PRAY WITHOUT CEASING!

Keeping the eye on the prize

2007-07-10T10:19:00.000-05:00

SO MUCH TO DO! We're moving on July 21 and are having difficulty finding time to pack. Emily makes it next to impossible to do anything productive when she's awake. So that means that sometimes purging and packing doesn't start until 10 pm - not the best time of day for my productivity, though it's not a problem for Night Owl Bruce.

We're motivated, though. Our downstairs neighbor, who is the reason for our move, continues to make our life difficult. You'd think after winning the war, she'd back off a bit. But evidently that's not her MO. We're both having to work overtime at prayer to let go of our anger and resentment, both toward our neighbor and our landlord, who has chosen to do what is expedient (not renew our lease) rather than what is right (force the neighbor to move out because of her repeated dishonesty, discourteousness, and unwillingness to live civilly with us). Neither of us can recall ever being so angry at people in our adult lives. This morning I was meditating on Ephesians 4:26ff: "'In your anger do not sin'; Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. ... Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." As I was reading that, I said to God, "We have been kind and compassionate to this woman for 9 months [ever since the problems started] and have only received vindictive behavior in return. I'm tired." Go figure, God has an answer for that - Galatians 6:9-10: "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers." Our neighbor claims to be a believer, even though we see no evidence of it in her life. Regardless of whether she is or isn't, we are responsible for our own actions. This passage says we are to do good to all people, with an extra emphasis on doing good to our Christian brothers and sisters. Doing good is not to be done exclusively to/for fellow believers. God, give us strength!

Meanwhile, our future is looking brighter. Our soon-to-be landlord seems very easy-going and desirous of being helpful. She actually gave us the keys to the new place last Friday when we signed the lease, saying she had already made the mortgage payment for July so we could move in whenever we wanted but not pay rent until August! How cool is that! She also said we could make whatever improvements we wanted. We just need to let her know in advance, then keep the receipts and she'll take that off the next month's rent! She understands that any improvements we make (adding a garbage disposal, painting, landscaping) will just help her in attracting either future renters or buyers. We've suggested that to our various landlords ever since moving here, but never got anyone to agree to it. Yippee!

Now if only we lived in a Star Trek world, where we could just beam our stuff over to the new place...

New home sweet home

2007-07-06T10:25:00.000-05:00

We're signing a lease tonight for our new (rental) home. We're renting a small house a little further south from where we are now. It's not the perfect package, but it's well taken care of and cute on the inside. Most importantly, we don't have to worry about a vengeful downstairs neighbor. Now the purging (see June 11 post) and packing begin in earnest.

A little United Nations on the 4th of July

2007-07-05T15:43:00.000-05:00

Emily and I spent almost 3 hours at the park yesterday. Every time we go, Emily makes new friends to play with, and probably 80% of the time the children are of a different ethnicity than her. At one point yesterday she was playing with a little girl of Asian heritage (whose father still spoke to her in the native tongue) and a slightly older girl who looked to be of Hispanic background. The three of them were scooping up the wood chips which cover the ground of the play area and building a "castle." They couldn't have cared less about the color of each other's skin. I just watched and smiled, thinking how much I love the fact that my daughter is growing up in a diverse city.

When I told Bruce about it later, he commented that the other awesome thing about it was that it wasn't a posed shot for PR purposes. It was just natural life. A part of me wishes I'd had my camera with me so I could have taken a picture and sent it to those fighting ethnically based conflicts in Sudan, Iraq, and myriad other places, not to mention racist organizations here in the US.

Vive la difference! E pluribus unum!

STRESS!!

2007-07-03T14:47:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the lack of posting - it's been a stressful few weeks. Can't write much now, but wanted to get some activity going on the blog.

Our free time - what little we have - has been taken up with trying to find a new place to live. I have personally gone to look at 30 properties and have corresponded with umpteen other property managers. Nothing has been the complete package of what we're looking for, but we finally on Sunday put down a deposit on a small house a little farther south of where we are now. After the disaster of living above someone who insists that we not make a sound whenever she's home (despite the fact that she was told before renting that there was a young child upstairs) and wreaks her revenge through a variety of methods, having a house all to ourselves is very appealing. The house is smaller than we would prefer, is farther away from Tower Grove Park (not walking distance for the first time since we moved to St. Louis), and the neighborhood is not particularly attractive, but we can make it work. We're just waiting for our application to be approved and for the new landlord to tell us when we can move in, as she still has a few things to do to the house. We want to move ASAP since Psycho Neighbor continues to make our life miserable even though she won the war.

All the housing stress has taken a toll on all of us, including Emily. She's been acting out a lot more, and she's never been a placid child to begin with. Only in the last week did we begin to realize that she is absorbing our stress. Even when she was an infant, she would start to fuss if she heard people talking with a slight edge to their voices. She has regressed in her potty training and became constipated for the first time in her life. Finally had to get medicine for her yesterday after she woke up from a short nap crying that her tummy hurt. But the medicine worked. When I got home from work, she came running up to me saying she went potty and her tummy didn't hurt anymore. Hopefully we won't have to go down that road again.

Last night we had a fun stress reliever. For our recent birthdays, Bruce's mom gave us tickets to The Police reunion concert (my idea). The Police were Bruce's favorite band when he was a teenager, and he's still a huge Sting fan. (Sting is on Bruce's elite "Stud" List!) Great concert - Sting and drummer Stewart Copeland were particularly impressive. Bruce was a little traumatized when the cameras for the Jumbotron (which we needed - we were about 6 rows from the top of the Scottrade Center!) did a close-up of guitarist Andy Summers' hands and there were liver spots! You know you're getting old when...

Well, I want to take advantage of having an early dismissal from work and go play with Emily! Happy and Safe 4th, everyone!

Old Home Week

2007-06-25T22:02:00.000-05:00

Had an interesting week in Nashville last week (no computer access, hence no blogging) attending the formerly-known-as-American-Symphony-Orchestra-League conference. (On Friday the League announced that it was officially changing its name to "League of American Orchestras." The rebranding was complete with buttons saying, "League of American Orchestras - We're no longer ASOLs (think about it)...)"

Most of the seminars were less enlightening than I'd hoped, especially the "Engaging Art" seminar. I thought the seminar was rather indicative of the issues that orchestras face: how do we engage new audiences who may want to have a more participatory art form (since we can now make our own blogs, videos, and other "art") without excluding the more traditional patrons? The League encouraged everyone to bring their laptops to the seminar and provided wi-fi and "plug-in" Internet access for everyone. Then people could "blog" their comments and/or questions as the seminar was going on and those posts would appear on screens in the room. It was certainly an experiment which was great in theory, but IMO unsatisfactory in the execution. All of us at the table I sat at found it difficult to read the comments, which changed every couple of minutes, and pay attention to the speaker. Most frustrating for me, however, was that there was no opportunity for those of us without a laptop to participate. Usually these types of seminars have microphones set up around the room, and people can line up and pose their questions to the panelists. This time it was all electronic and the moderator simply chose what blog posts he wanted the panel to address. So many of us felt left out. I actually left before the seminar was over.

The opening plenary session was an example of how surreal the week was. Giving welcoming remarks were Nashville Symph exec dir Alan Valentine, who came on board toward the end of my tenure with the organization, and NSO board chairman/erstwhile companion of the late NSO conductor Kenneth Schermerhorn/arts supporter extraordinaire Martha Ingram. Then the Christian music world, which had been Bruce's world, butted in with a welcome from Amy Grant, who also was my idol during my teenage years. The session was held in the revered Ryman Auditorium. So a bunch of my worlds were colliding and left me with a bit of an identity crisis. Who am I representing??? I'm doing orchestra stuff in Nashville, but not for the NSO!

Most inspiring and envy-inducing that first day was a panel discussion about how Nashville gained its recent ranking (June 2006) as the #1 Smartest Place to Live by Kiplinger and how the arts play a role in that. Nashville mayor Bill Purcell seems to be every arts lover's dream, understanding that Nashville's prominence in the country music world wouldn't be enough to generate the economic development desired by city leaders. Purcell grew up in Philly and said he attended Philadelphia Orchestra concerts as a child, which made him an early believer in the importance of the arts in a city's quality of life. Purcell was instrumental (pardon the pun) in the construction of the Schermerhorn Symphony Center - the city donated the land and I believe it has pledged $20M-$30M for maintenance over the next several years. (Unfortunately, I can't find newspaper articles to confirm the monetary donation so I'm going by memory.) Pardon me while I wipe up my drool. The SLSO, despite having a worldwide reputation for decades, gets little more than lip service from our city government.

Much more to say but it'll have to wait.

Prepping for Conference

2007-06-17T21:43:00.000-05:00

On Wed., I'll be heading to my old stomping grounds, though the grounds are actually quite new. The Nashville Symphony, where I worked for nearly 4 years, is now a shooting star in the orchestral firmament, thanks to a successful endowment and capital campaign which culminated last September in the opening of a new symphony hall. The annual conference of the American Symphony Orchestra League will be held there this coming week, and I'm hoping for some good discussions about the many challenges facing our art form: declining audience, increasing expenses, a potentially outmoded business model, and other matters. ArtsJournal.com has started a blog centered around a new book called "Engaging Art: The Next Great Transformation of America's Cultural Life," authored by fellows at the Curb Center for Art, Enterprise, and Public Policy at Vanderbilt University. (Where was THAT when I lived in Nashville and worked at Vandy???) I've been too busy trying to get things done in the office prior to being gone for 4 days that I haven't read the blog (I'll probably print out the book excerpts to read on the plane), but there are some great people writing. For anyone interested in the future of the arts in America, it's worth perusing. And it'll give you a glimpse of where my head will be starting Wed.

Happy Father's Day!

2007-06-17T18:45:00.000-05:00

I'm extremely blessed to have two fantastic (earthly) fathers in my life. First, there's my dad. I don't have any digital pics of us when I was a child, but I can show you what kind of a grandfather he is:

Dad is solid as a rock and a great example for any man desiring to learn how to be a godly father, husband, and all-around man of God. Various childhood memories include coming downstairs in the early morning to get ready for school and seeing Dad on his knees in prayer; persevering through difficult times at his job in order to provide for the family; trying again and again to fix the roof leak at our house (another form of perseverance); riding his bike a couple of miles to a store and coming back balancing a rake or shovel on his shoulder and having bags of stuff in the bike baskets (kids, don't try this at home!); researching and writing about one obscure topic after another; and always placing God and his family as his top priorities. Thank you, Dad, for always being there for us and leading by example.

Bruce, as I expected, is a fantastic father to our daughter. He's affectionate, imaginative, and a thoughtful disciplinarian. And it's certainly not every father who would love to be a full-time, at-home dad. I'm sure Bruce and Emily will share a special bond throughout their lives because of the years they've spent together at home. Bruce gets teary when he thinks about Emily starting pre-school in the fall.

Here's an example of the lengths to which Bruce will go as a father:

(He was trying to get Emily to let her face be painted - it didn't work.)

Happy Father's Day to the 2 great dads in my life, and to great dads everywhere!

A Role Model Lost

2007-06-15T13:05:00.000-05:00

Ruth Bell Graham, wife of Billy Graham, died yesterday at age 87. A truly amazing woman who knew how to be a strong woman of God while also submitting to her husband. I confess I know little of Mrs. Graham's life; I actually learned a lot by reading her obituary in the Washington Post today. For instance, I didn't know that she was so involved in ministering to the indigent. She obviously was a very secure woman to not insist on receiving her own notoriety beyond her husband's.

I was pleasantly surprised at the reverence with which she was treated by the Post, obviously a very secular news source. The Grahams truly took great pains to be above reproach. A personal favorite story in the obit was when she took away a Vietnam War protester's sign at a rally for President Ford. The protester at first filed charges for assault (yeah, that's believable)! He later had to admit she just tapped him on the shoulder.

I would post a link to the Washington Post article, but I'm a registered user so my links won't work for other people. Go to www.washingtonpost.com and it's in the Metro Obituaries section.

the stuff of life

2007-06-11T00:35:00.000-05:00

We are in the unfortunate position of having to move twice within a 12-month period. Neither last year's nor this year's move is voluntary, though for very different reasons. In an effort to find the silver lining in all this, I'm trying to use this as motivation to purge much of the unused junk we've been hauling around all our adult lives. This is an easier task for myself than for Bruce, both in terms of being able to prioritize and having less of the "we might need this someday" gene. I have to give him credit, though. He's come a long way in our 12 years of marriage, thanks in part to having to move several times and most of all thanks to organizing guru Peter Walsh and the now-defunct TLC show "Clean Sweep."

Clean Sweep Tips 1
Clean Sweep Tips 2

We became hooked on "Clean Sweep" for the two short seasons it was on TLC. Peter really got into the psychology of why people hold onto stuff. I love the feeling of throwing things away and uncluttering. My problem is having enough time to do it. I like to get in a groove and just go for hours. At this point in my life, the only way to do that is to go into the wee hours of the morning, which isn't particularly enticing. Since I work full-time, I have precious little time with Emily as it is so I don't like to put her off even more in order to sort through junk - not to mention Bruce needs a break after a full day of corraling our rambunctious 3-year-old!

Several years ago I read Richard Foster's Freedom of Simplicity with some girl friends in a Bible study. I have not implemented as many of his principles as I should, but it has implanted several things in my mind. As I look at all of our stuff, especially all that has remained in boxes for several years, I realize, for example, that our search for a new place to live is complicated by the fact that we have to have enough space for all of it. That limits our options and in general increases the amount of rent we'll have to pay - a bad combo for people on a tight budget like we are. The higher rent diminishes the amount of discretionary income, which could be used to pay down debt (a high priority for us), save for retirement (close to non-existent for both of us), put money away for Emily's education (existent only because of her generous grandparents), or make additional charitable gifts. And when I look at the living conditions of others in St. Louis and around the world, I kick myself for my materialism. I have so much. I have never been hungry, never been homeless, never been without clothing. I have a loving family and most importantly a loving and generous God. What more do I need? I certainly don't want Emily to fall prey to the lies of the marketing industry which would tell her that she can't be happy until she has the next great widget, drives a certain kind of car, or has this kind of house in this kind of neighborhood. So how does my life model that?

Getting to know me - some random thoughts

2007-06-06T23:54:00.000-05:00

In my first post, I said I thought I might have some things to say that would be of worth to the blogosphere. Of course, I wasn't considering the fact that most days I don't have any free time until after 10 pm and sometimes later. And tonight was definitely later. So tonight I'm just going to write down some random thoughts that will most likely be launching points for future posts, and for now will just give you a glimpse into my befogged brain.

1. God is not affiliated with any political party. This is a fallen world and so far I have yet to see a political candidate or party compile a political platform which is entirely consistent with Scripture. Yes, I'm aware that I'm being somewhat egotistical by implying that I know exactly how a political platform should line up with Scripture. But I have yet to understand how Republicans can be pro-life in the abortion debate and also be anti-gun control, and I don't understand how Christian Democrats can defend abortion and other moral issues which are inconsistent with biblical teachings.

2. Trickle-down economics is antithetical to Christianity because it ultimately means believing that people are inherently good. Whenever trickle-down economics is implemented, the gap between rich and poor widens.

3. Much of what ails the world these days is that most people do not view things in a holistic manner. This is true in medicine, education, the intersection of politics and religion, urban revitalization, and changing the economics of an orchestra.

4. Bruce and I continually indict ourselves in our relationship with God as we discipline our daughter!

Way past time for bed so that's all for now.

Taking the plunge

2007-06-05T19:30:00.000-05:00

Enjoying early spring at the Missouri Botanical Garden, March 2007

C'mon, everybody's doing it!! Yeah, I'm beginning to think this is the only way I'm going to satisfy everyone who says, "You never call, you never write." OK, it also looks like fun, and I'm narcissistic enough to think I have some things to say that are of some worth for the blogosphere.

"Life in 3D" refers to our little DeChambeau family - my husband, Bruce, and our daughter, Emily. Some of this will be postings on life in our branch of the DeChambeau/Smith (my maiden name) family, and some will be musings on my work in the nonprofit arts industry and on our desire to be "salt and light" in the world. I'm sure there will be other "renegade" posts about random life matters, too!